Silence Is Everything
by princesspomegranate
Summary: Tristan hadn't seen his sister since the day he'd left, but as the time the Knights are to be freed from their service to Rome is near its end, she rides to the Fort bearing a tale of horror. Eventual GawainxOC.
1. Comunicating Is Not So Easy

It was late morning when they saw her, atop her grey horse and riding hard beside the edge of the forest. Dagonet and Gawain watched her long, dark curls billowing behind her as her worn, black cape did. There was something so incredibly familiar with how the woman moved; but that wasn't really what they were looking at. The two Knights were more focussed on the figures following her; the blue demons native to the land.

Arrows flew past her, one only narrowly missing her. That was when the Knights spurred into motion, heading straight for the Woads trailing the woman. She saw them out of the corner of her eye, and apparently, so did the Woads, who turned their attention to their familiar enemy, the Sarmatian Knights. They met with a clash, and though Dagonet and Gawain were outnumbered, they were far more skilful in their art.

At the sound of screams and death, Kyna slowed her horse and turned back to the small battle. She had no idea who the two men were, but they were helping her and she knew that she owed them the same. Kyna drew back her bowstring and let an arrow loose into a Woad that was on top of Dagonet and attempting to tackle him to the ground. _What a stupid thing to do_, she thought as she notched back another arrow and considered the height of one of her rescuers.

Her next arrow lodged into the throat of the last Woad alive, one that was in the process of running back into the dark forest. Gawain watched as the arrow flew past him and met its mark, spraying blood like a fountain. _There's_ definitely _something familiar about her_, he thought as he observed the precision of her shot and pulled his axe from the shoulder of a dead man.

None of the three seemed to want to speak first, and Kyna just looked over the men warily. But when Gawain took a step forward, he found that her next arrow was trained on him. He stopped immediately and held up his hands.

"We mean you no harm," Dagonet said earnestly.

Kyna's eyes flickered over both men as if she was judging their honesty. Maybe they had just rescued her, but Kyna wasn't taking any chances. She knew how men could be. But eventually, Kyna gave a small nod and lowered her bow. Gawain gave a small, inward sigh of relief. He had seen the deadly look in her deep, brown eyes and had known immediately that she was prepared to kill him. He had seen that look before in many others, in many of his brothers, in fact.

The two men looked up at the woman still on her horse and saw that her clothes looked well-worn, as if she'd been travelling hard for a long time. They wondered who she was. She didn't look British, and certainly wasn't Roman. But it was only as Kyna pushed her long, wavy hair from where it lay dishevelled, in front of her face, that Gawain and Dagonet realised why this girl looked so familiar. The small tattoos on her cheeks were a dead giveaway.

"Who are you?" Dagonet asked, noticing her tattoos at the same time as Gawain did.

The woman didn't answer. She merely looked back at them with those deep, brown eyes and frowned. The men had definitely seen that expression before. For her part, Kyna wondered why they wanted to know who she was; she could see no reason for them to actually want to know her name- or no reason that she liked anyway. _This woman _has_ to be related to Tristan_, Gawain thought as she eyed him and his fellow Knight.

"I think that perhaps you should come back to the Fort with us," Gawain started.

Immediately he found that Kyna's arrow was trained on him again, her bowstring begging for release. Her eyes held their deadly glare once again. She'd be damned if she was going to let some men that she didn't know whisk her off to some place that she didn't know. Dagonet took a step forward and her arrow turned on him. He stopped.

"As I said before, we mean you no harm."

She didn't lower her bow.

"Gawain only suggested that we take you back to the Fort because you look incredibly familiar to someone we know."

Kyna froze. _Familiar?_ _Does that mean that they..._ She lowered her bow and reached into her saddlebag. Dagonet and Gawain frowned at each other, confused, but Kyna didn't notice. She rummaged through the contents of the bag until she found the thick roll of paper and a piece of sharpened charcoal- one of many that she always kept with her.

The two men were left to wait and watch her scribble something out onto the first sheet. She held it out in front of them, and they both looked at the words she'd written. _If she is related to Tristan, then she's a Sarmatian who can write in Latin... Odd,_ Gawain thought as he read her words.

_**Who do I look familiar to?**_

She wasn't taking any chances in letting them trick her. If they meant Tristan, then they would say so; if they didn't, she would leave. And if they couldn't read what she'd written, she would leave. The Knights paused, not at all understanding why she was writing instead of talking to them. _Perhaps such quietness runs in their family..._ Gawain thought, remembering how Tristan barely ever spoke. It was Dagonet that answered her question though.

"We are of the Sarmatian Knights," he began.

Kyna's heart almost skipped a beat.

"You look like our brother, Tristan."

Kyna could have smiled, she could have kissed both men right then and there. But she didn't. She merely wrote a short reply.

_**My**__** brother.**_

Gawain and Dagonet blinked and both eventually nodded. They weren't really shocked that she was Tristan's sister- there was too much of a familial resemblance between them. What had taken them aback was that Tristan actually had a sister and that she had travelled all the way to Britain. Gawain had never heard Tristan speak about his family; he didn't even know that Tristan had a sister, but he was simply stunned and baffled at why, or even how, she'd taken such a dangerous journey out to Britain; especially since she had no idea if her brother was even still alive. _It must be urgent, or she would have waited the few months until we're freed_, Gawain thought.

"We can take you to him," Gawain suggested again.

Kyna was hesitant still, but after something flickered across her face, she nodded once. As the Knights mounted their horses once more she watched them, almost curious about the men her brother had fought alongside for the past fourteen and a half years.

She looked at Gawain properly, taking in his appearance for the first time. His long, golden hair seemed almost like a thick mane, but his eyes were what caught her. They were a bright blue; so different to the deep brown eyes that she and her brother shared. Dagonet, as she had already observed, was very tall, and seemed to be very intimidating. But the words he spoke and the way he spoke them made her feel as if he was really quite gentle.

They began riding, and the Knights on either side of Kyna. Some would have interpreted it as the protective gesture that it was meant as. Anything from Sarmatia was precious, and they were determined that she would not be hurt while in their company. But Kyna didn't take comfort in the men on either side of her. It made her feel trapped. She said nothing of it though.

"I'm Gawain, by the way."

"Dagonet."

Kyna nodded, scribbling down her own name in response. As they continued to ride, Kyna offered up no attempts at conversation; no news of home.

Uncomfortable with the silence, Gawain asked, "Why did you come here?"

Kyna merely bit the inside of her lip and stared at the Knight on her left as if she was fighting some inner battle. Confused, Gawain couldn't decide if she'd won or lost as the reply she gave was vague at best.

_**To find my brother.**_

She refused to elaborate. There was something in her eyes as she rode though that made the way she wasn't speaking look painful. It took Gawain a moment to understand, but her silence and the way she was only writing to communicate made him ask anyway.

"Can I ask you something?"

_**You just did**_, she wrote back bluntly.

"Yes, but... Look, I'm sorry to ask... but... can you talk?" Gawain asked, trying to make sense of the silent scout's silent sister.

Dagonet turned his head to the woman between them, and both men watched as Kyna's eyes found the floor for a moment, before glancing back up at them. And she shook her head slowly, pain evident in her deep brown eyes.

She didn't offer up any explanation; all she wrote was, _**Tristan doesn't know that I'm mute.**_

Gawain blinked. _That was what the pain in her eyes meant_, he thought, knowing now that something had had to have happened to _make_ her mute. His fists clenched. Kyna's eyes flicked painfully from Gawain to Dagonet before she looked back down and fiddled with her horse's reins so that she didn't have to meet their gaze.

It took them around twenty minutes to get back to the Fort. And the guards at the Gates didn't pause to open them for the three. They rode through to the stables and dismounted. They left their horses with the stable master, and Dagonet turned to a man that seemed to know the Knights well.

"Jols, we need you to call everyone to a meeting."

"Right," the man called Jols answered as he left the stables.

Kyna held onto her saddlebag as if she was determined to never let it go. The two men didn't understand, buy they said nothing.

"You're bleeding," Gawain observed as they stood there for a moment.

Kyna looked down at her arm to where Gawain had indicated and saw that he was right. She shrugged thinking, _I've had worse. Much worse._

"I'll take a look after you've seen Tristan. Come," Dagonet said, ready to lead the way.

Kyna nodded. She smiled, and her dark eyes lit up. She would see her brother within minutes. Her initial happiness was drowned out though, as she realised that she would have to tell Tristan what happened; why she was so different to the little girl he'd left behind all those years ago.

Kyna slung her bag over her shoulder and followed the Knights through a gated courtyard and into the building beyond. Her thoughts hit her in a dizzying flurry. She had waited so long for this moment, and now that it was finally upon her, she was so nervous about it.

They traversed through the building's seemingly endless corridors that seemed a maze to the woman not really paying attention. Everything seemed such a blur to Kyna as her thoughts whirred. They finally stopped before a door at the end of one corridor. Kyna took a deep breath, trying to calm herself for what was coming. But as Dagonet reached for the door, Kyna threw herself against it, jarring her shoulder and clicking the door closed again.

"What are you doing?" a confused Gawain asked, frowning at the woman.

She grimaced and flattened out a piece of paper from the crumpled wad still in her hand. More words were scribbled down and she held them out to be read.

_**When Tristan was younger he sometimes... overreacted to bad news... I don't know if he's changed, **__**but I**_

She paused considering how to phrase the next part of her sentence. Kyna kept crossing things out as if she was trying to write the words before they had formed correctly in her mind.

_**The news I have is not good. **__**I don't know if I'll**__** If he does react how I think he will... Will you help me make sure he doesn't do anything stupid?**_

Both men read her words and then turned to each other. It didn't take them long to nod in response. Neither had seen Tristan overreact to anything; his emotions had always been played close to his chest- so close, that sometimes the Knights doubted that he even felt anything at all.

But Kyna seemed so persistent that neither Knight could have said no to her. She stepped back from the door and allowed Dagonet to open the door again. Kyna waited behind the two men, unseen by those inside the adjoining room.

She couldn't see them either, but she heard a voice say, "Finally! Considering you called us here with such urgency, you're a little late!"

"Shut up, Lancelot," Gawain said, his tone low.

"Gawain. Dagonet," a calm, almost formal, voice said.

When Gawain and Dagonet were inside the room, they separated and the room was revealed to Kyna- as she was to everyone inside. She didn't pause to look over the room, but vaguely noticed the men sat around a large, round table as she searched for her brother's face. It didn't take her long to find Tristan; and, as their eyes met, Kyna saw him straighten from where he leant against the table.

The other Knights merely stared confusedly at the woman. They obviously had not seen the tattoos on her face that gave her away so completely. They were not even given the chance to speak before Tristan was up and standing beside the sister he had not seen for nearly fifteen years.

Kyna didn't even realise that she was crying as she threw her arms around him. Tristan's arms encircled her and both siblings lost track of how long that they stood there embracing. The others didn't though.

Dagonet and Gawain remained standing, just watching Kyna and Tristan, whilst the others sat by, confused at the movement of their silent scout to this mysterious woman. Gawain could see Tristan's expression from where he stood, and he saw that the Knight's face was as masked as ever, all except for his eyes; the eyes that held something deeper than he'd ever before seen present in them. It was Arthur that eventually broke the silence that held the room.

"Tristan?"

His voice held the question of a wanted explanation. Tristan only moved back slightly to turn to his commander, his arms still around his younger sister.

"Kyna," Tristan said quietly.

Kyna smiled into his shoulder where her head rested. _It's so good to hear him speak,_ she thought.

"My sister."

Realisation dawned on the faces of every Knight around the table. But with that came cautionary glances that wondered why the woman was there; why she had made the journey from their home to the hell that was Britain. Just as Tristan was about to turn back to face the others, he noticed the spot on her sleeve that blood was seeping through.

"What happened?" Tristan asked her, concern rippling his usually emotionless voice.

Kyna frowned, trying to figure out how to answer him. She couldn't. Her eyes met Gawain's as she wished she could tell him. She wasn't quite sure that she was ready to explain what had happened, but the moment had found her anyway. Gawain saved her though, answering Tristan's question for her.

"Woads. When we found her, there was a group of them following her."

Kyna nodded in assent, and a frown furrowed Tristan's brow. Anger flashed through him at the thought of the blue demons chasing after his sister. But something tugged at the back of Tristan's mind as he looked at his sister. She, of course, was older than he remembered, but he noticed that, as he saw her now, Kyna was very much grown up. Her eyes were so much older than those of the ten year old girl that he'd left back in Sarmatia, as if they had seen far too much. In truth, they _had_.

Kyna leant back from Tristan, trying to go for the letter in her bag. The letter that she had written so long ago. The letter that explained everything in a way that she no long could. Kyna's face had paled as she sorted through the only belongings she had that remained in her saddlebag.

"What's wrong?" Tristan asked, frowning.

Kyna paused for a moment, and then shrugged, not really knowing if she was okay. She felt nauseous because what she'd have to explain to her brother within seconds. Kyna was almost glad that she had her letter to explain for her, because she knew that if she had to speak her tale, she'd surely stumble over her words and end up crying as she so often had when she thought of the dark events that took her from her home.

Still rummaging through her bag's contents, her fingers finally grasped the letter she searched for while Tristan stared at her with a blank yet somehow worried expression. She pulled the letter free of the bag and clutched it to herself for a second. Kyna passed it to Tristan then, who merely looked at the letter and then back to his sister. He didn't take it.

"Kyna," he said in a low voice.

The tone in his voice was one that she remembered from her childhood; one that told her that she should tell him what she was hiding or she'd be in trouble. Only now, she couldn't tell him. And she was in trouble. Or she had been. Kyna could only stare into his eyes and press the letter into his hand until he took it from her.

Genuine worry crossed Tristan's face then; something that the other Knights had never seen in the expression of their silent scout. But Tristan didn't care. The mask was gone with his sister; and right now, he could tell that something was wrong.

Even though she tried to hold them back, tears once more spilled free of the prison she'd long held them back in. She'd tried to lock her past away for so long, and now she had to share it with her brother. He deserved to know. Kyna closed her eyes and bit her bottom lip. She'd thought she could handle this. She was wrong. She couldn't look at Tristan; not now that she could already tell she was hurting him.

Kyna was saved though, when, as he and Dagonet took their seats, Gawain said, "Tristan, maybe you should read that letter."

This earned him a harsh glare from the quiet Knight; but everyone could clearly see the reason behind it. They all knew that whatever news that Kyna was about to give would not be good. It was obvious from her very manner; and the tears only confirmed it. They'd all worried about home- and Kyna's tears made everything that he'd always secretly feared a reality.

Kyna nodded once in response to Gawain's words, and used them as an opportunity to open her eyes and risk a glance at her brother's face. She regretted it immediately; his eyes betrayed the feelings that he had long kept hidden. Kyna blinked back her tears. She held up one finger, hoping that they'd understand that she needed a moment; and fled the room. Tristan's deep, confused eyes followed her to the door as he almost went after her. Almost.

Arthur stopped him though, as his voice interrupted, "Tristan, perhaps you should give her a moment."

Tristan knew that it wasn't meant as advice. His fists clenched in an anger that he was now working hard to conceal, almost crumpling Kyna's letter. The silence that had been, once again took up residence in the room. No Knight dared say anything to Tristan; they could see him seething beneath a mask that usually worked to hide any and all emotion. Tristan just stared at the door, wanting to follow the woman he'd not seen for so long. His sister. His little sister. He wanted to know what had happened to her, and he wanted to hear it from her, not a letter.

"The letter?"

That caught Tristan's attention. He was still angry, but his hands came up and he unravelled the letter. Whether he liked reading it in a letter or not, he needed to know what had happened to cause his sister to make her way to this Hell. The others just watched as he read through Kyna's letter, trying to identify the emotions as they passed over his features. The Knights had barely ever seen such expression of emotion in Tristan.

_**Tristan. Brother. That this letter has reached you is good. It means you're alive. I regret that the news this letter brings, however, is not good. I hate that this is what I have to tell you, but I must, and this is the only way that I can.**_

_**When the day came that you had to leave, I watched you go, wondering where you were being taken; if I would ever see you again. Do you remember how I ran after you? How you had to stop me and send me back before the Romans did? I cried for weeks after you were gone. I'd still ride out, as we used to. I'd still go out hunting, as we used to. I even taught myself to fight. Back then, home was how it should have been. Well, it wasn't, because you were missing. But bar your glaring exception, things went on.**_

_**For eight years, things just went on. But then, in one day, everything changed. Slavers came from the West. There were so many of them that we stood no chance. Father knew. He sent me away; made me promise to leave while the others stood to fight. I didn't get half a mile away before I turned back.**_

_**What I saw as I rode back was horrific. Our village had put up a good fight. One better than the Slavers had expected, I think. There were so many dead when I got there. All of the men... Father. They'd rounded up the women and children still alive; there weren't many. Our mother wasn't among them. I tried my best and killed a few of them, but after a while...**_

_**I won't tell you the full extent of what they did to me. I try to forget those things every day. But I can't. They gave me a few permanent reminders. The only thing they did that I have to tell you should explain any odd actions that you've seen of me. I fought everything that they did; too much apparently... I didn't think that this would be as hard to write as it is... They cut out my tongue, brother; said that I was better silent.**_

Tristan stopped reading then; his expression a mixture pure rage and horror. The hand grasping the letter shaking with anger just bubbling through to the surface, the other balled into so tight a fist that his nails had broken the skin of his palm. Tristan's breathing was heavy and every man present could see the pain written in place of his usual mask.

The Knights looked at each other, most of them not knowing what Kyna could possibly have written to make such a change in their usually expressionless scout. All expected the worst- as they all secretly had for their own families. Dagonet and Gawain knew at least some of it though. And Dagonet would have be the one to calm Tristan down.

Out of all the Knights, Tristan seemed to be most amiable- if he could ever be described as such- around the other quieter Knight. Not even Dagonet, as he moved back to where Tristan stood, could calm him down though. Tristan didn't really even notice Dagonet's hand on his shoulder. All that Tristan could see was Kyna's words, blinding him to all else. _**They cut out my tongue, brother. They cut out my tongue. They cut out my tongue.**_

Gawain stood, he wasn't going to watch Tristan that way for any longer. _If Dagonet can't snap him out of it, only she'll be able to_, he thought as he left the room, not even waiting for anyone to ask where he was going. Gawain pushed open the door and stepped into the corridor beyond.

It didn't take him long to find her, slumped against the wall just around the corner. She'd clearly been crying; she still was. When Kyna saw his shadow on the floor before her, she looked up. His face told her what she'd been dreading. Tristan hadn't reacted well; she hadn't expected him to- but it hurt to have to hurt him all the same.

"You'll have to come back in. I've never seen Tristan that angry... Or in so much pain," Gawain added as he held out a hand for her.

Kyna took it with reluctantly, as she stood and she used her other hand to wipe away one of the fallen tears staining her face. She took a deep breath, steeling herself for what was to come, as Gawain led her back to the hall and the others.

"I don't know what you wrote, but... it's not good," he said, referring to Tristan's reaction.

As soon as Gawain pushed the door open, the woman was inside. She went straight to Tristan and Dagonet drew back immediately. Kyna took hold of his white-knuckled hand; she saw his lip twitch. It wasn't working to calm him down and she knew it. Kyna placed her hands on the sides of Tristan's face, forcing him to look at her. She held him like that until he met her eyes.

The only reason that it calmed him down was because it was the exact same motion that she'd made when she was a ten year old girl, saying goodbye as her brother was taken away. It brought him back to the woman she was now, not what had happened to her while he was gone. Tristan embraced his sister in a single, fluid motion. Kyna wrapped her arms around him too, trying to forget all the memories that telling him had brought back. The memories that would never go away.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: Well, here it is, the rewritten version. I'd love to know what you think (even though some of the things are the same). :)<strong>

**Kit xx**


	2. Finally Reunited

No one in the room said anything, though everyone was curious. They wanted to know how it was possible to have moved Tristan to the extent that Kyna had. They wanted to know what was in that letter. For his part, Tristan pulled back from his sister's hands and looked down.

He couldn't help but notice how strong Kyna was, not just physically, but mentally, even though she'd suffered through so much. She placed a delicate hand on his arm and waited for him, or someone, to say something. It was Arthur, who decided that he would break the silence surrounding them.

"Tristan. Kyna. Perhaps you should sit down."

Again, it really wasn't meant as advice. Kyna faltered for a second; who did this Roman think he was to order them around? But she knew that he was Tristan's commander, and that something bad would happen if Tristan didn't do as he was ordered. In her mind though, she pondered on the commander.

He was giving orders, he was Roman; those things alone meant he should be hated. But the way he'd allowed Kyna and Tristan's reunion, the way he hadn't demanded an explanation was what made her falter. He clearly wasn't like the other Roman's she had known- and that was no bad thing.

But Tristan soothed her fear with a simple look, and he led her to a part of the table where there were empty seats- his own, usual seat was surround by others. So he pulled out an empty chair for her and sat down beside her, leaving his usual chair empty.

"Would you mind explaining your story?" Arthur asked Kyna.

_Would I mind?_ He was definitely unlike the other Romans that she'd met. But Kyna pushed that thought aside and started to write again.

_**In case you didn't notice, I can't talk. If you want to read the letter, you may, but please allow me not to be present when you discuss it. I suffered through those things once, I don't need them repeated any more than in my nightmares.**_

Half-stunned as he read through Kyna's words, Arthur composed himself and nodded.

"Very well. There's a room just off this one that you can wait in."

_Right. _Kyna thought, as she stood and, with one last look at Tristan, left the room, taking her bag with her. Tristan wanted to follow her, yet he knew this discussion would require him to be here. _She's only in the next room_, he reasoned. Tristan handed the letter to Arthur, who insisted on reading the thing aloud for the whole room.

Tristan didn't want to hear it again, but he knew that he had to stay. He simply stared at the engraved round table before him as Arthur spoke. Hearing the signal of where he'd read up to, Tristan started paying more attention again.

"_**They cut out my tongue, brother; said that I was better silent.**_

_** It's hard to deal with. I cope. I couldn't communicate properly with anyone for two years. That was the hardest to deal with. The slavers sold me after those years, when they'd... had enough of me. The man I was... sold to... wasn't much better. Everything had just become coping by that point. Until, that is, I met another woman working in the house. She got me access to paper and taught me to write. It was like I could talk again. You have no idea what it's like for no one to be able to understand you for so long, and then to finally be heard. It's beautiful.**_

_** I left that house not long after. I didn't 'ask' to leave, I don't even know if the man who... bought me... ever even looked for me. If he did, it was probably just because he wanted to kill me for running. I spent the next few years running, doing odd jobs for money. I even bought my horse, Ivor. I did it all to search for your post; and I searched and searched until I finally found you. Just murmurs of the famous Sarmatian Knights in Britain. It was a long shot, but it was all I had. And now, as you read this, I am here, with the family I've not had for years.**_

_**Forever, your sister,**_

_**Kyna."**_

Arthur placed the letter on the table in front of him and let out a long sigh. The whole room was silent for a while.

"I'm sorry, Tristan," Arthur said, breaking the quiet.

"I won't keep you from your sister any longer."

He paused and then added, "Why don't you take her to Agravaine's old quarters since they are so near yours, Tristan. She can stay there. And Bors will you ask-"

"Vanora'd be happy to bring 'er some clothes and food and whatever else she wants," Bors interrupted, knowing already what Arthur would ask.

Tristan nodded and made to leave, but Dagonet's voice held him back for a moment.

"She's got a cut on her arm. I said I'd have a look at it after she'd seen you. I can do it now, or I'll wait if you'd prefer."

Tristan considered the tall Knight for a second before he nodded and replied, "Now."

No matter how much that he wanted to be alone with his sister, he put Kyna's best interests first. And her being well was far more important than anything else. Dagonet stood and nodded to the others, before leaving with the darker Knight. Tristan walked immediately to the other room across the hall and pulled open the door.

His sister was sat inside the small windowless room that was lit only by a few candles. When she saw him, Kyna smiled, but as she saw the tall Knight behind her brother, she faltered a little. Sure, he and the other, Gawain, had helped her with the Woads, and indeed, brought her to her brother. But that didn't mean that she trusted either of them.

Seeing the doubt in her expression, Tristan said in the softer voice that was reserved seemingly only for his sister, "Dagonet just wants to check your arm."

Kyna blinked. She had completely forgotten about her arm. She looked down at the cut through the ripped sleeve of her shirt. It looked as if it had stopped bleeding, and she had her doubts about the necessity of it being checked. When compared with memories that flashed through her mind of the wounds that she'd had inflicted upon her at the hands of others earlier in her life; this was nothing. A scratch.

But, if her brother was anything like she remembered, then she wouldn't get to leave this room without Dagonet making sure that she'd be fine. So Kyna nodded, and both her brother and the other Knight stepped into the small room. Dagonet asked that Kyna move closed to one of the candles lighting the room, so that he could more easily inspect the wound. She did.

"Would you mind rolling up your sleeve?" Dagonet asked, not wanting to make Kyna uncomfortable by just doing it himself.

She gave him a brief smile as she recognised his intention, before her other hand moved to push her sleeve up past the wound. Kyna hadn't really wanted to do that though. She hadn't really wanted to unveil the scars that crossed over her body in such noticeable- and unnoticeable- places. Not to her brother. Not yet.

But the scars littering just that one arm, crisscrossing angry reminders across her, drew both men's gaze. Tristan and Dagonet's eyes met. They knew what had happened to Kyna, but they hadn't imagined what had been done to her had been done as viciously and heavily as the scars proved.

The thoughts running through Tristan's mind were many and all confused; but one thing stood out; _someone would pay for what they did to Kyna_. Dagonet was also angered by the vicious marks marring her otherwise flawless skin. _No one should have those things done to them_, he thought as he turned his attention to the newest cut in her skin.

In an attempt to calm himself, Tristan leant against the back wall and watched his brother-in-arms check over his sister. He would trust no other with the care of his sister and knew her to be in very good and capable hands. But that didn't stop him from noticing that she flinched, her muscles tensing, as Dagonet reached out to touch her arm.

"Sorry," the tall Knight apologised quietly.

The woman shook her head. She knew he was being incredibly gentle for a man that had such large hands as he, and a man who looked as intimidating as he did also. But really, the only thing that was stopping her from wrenching her arm free of the Knight's grasp was because her brother was near.

Tristan wouldn't let anything happen to her. She was safe with Tristan. And _that_ she was certain of.

"I should probably stitch it, just to make sure it doesn't get infected," Dagonet said, withdrawing his hand from Kyna's arm.

Both Knights noticed that she seemed to let out a long breath of relief as the touch was removed. Neither spoke of it though. They both knew exactly why she wouldn't want people- men, especially- touching her. The scars on her skin carried a permanent reminder of that. They were also a reminder of the fact that people could be cruel. Truly cruel.

Kyna nodded to Dagonet, though she thought it pointless. On closer examination, it appeared to be as she'd thought before; a mere scratch. But the look in Tristan's eyes told her that she was having the tiny cut stitched whether she liked it or not.

"We should go to the infirmary then," Dagonet said, as he stood and walked into the corridor.

He waited as Tristan held out a hand for his sister to help her to her feet. Kyna looked up at him as she rolled her sleeve back down, covering up the angry lines that were etched into her skin. Tristan's was the only hand that Kyna would never hesitate to take. And she reached out, placing her hand in her brother's, letting him pull her to her feet.

Tristan encircled an arm protectively over his sister's shoulder as the two men led her outside the building they were in and towards the infirmary. Kyna tried to keep her expression blank as she realised that she and her brother were receiving more than a few odd stares. She wished that they'd stop looking at her. _Gods, I hate people. So much_, she thought with a sigh.

When they arrived at the infirmary, the men led her inside another small room, but this one that had far more light flooding into it than the previous. Tristan stopped beside an almost rigid-looking bed, and Kyna took that as an indication that she was meant to take a seat.

As she did, Dagonet brought over some medical supplies that he'd gathered from the shelf on the far wall. Kyna stared at the objects as he placed them on the table beside her. She watched as he threaded the curved needle and moved to place it near her skin. But Kyna tensed and looked away; she didn't have good experiences with sharp objects meeting her skin.

But she barely felt the tiny prick of the needle as Dagonet worked it so expertly and delicately to close the wound. Kyna felt the Knight's hand leave her arm again though, and with great relief, she tilted her head to the side as she looked over to him through a few strands of her dark brown hair that had fallen across her face. With that, Dagonet couldn't help but see similarity in the siblings.

"You should be fine," Dagonet said as he moved back from the woman, giving her back her personal space.

"I'll leave you two," he added as he slipped through the door.

Tristan gave his fellow Knight a grateful stare before he disappeared and placed a hand on his shoulder. She turned her gaze to her brother and tried to give him a convincing smile. Surprisingly, it wasn't too hard to pull off. Kyna had a lot to be happy about. She was safe. But, more importantly, she'd found her brother. Finally.

"Come. I'll take you to your room."

Kyna nodded and smiled again, but still not enough to make her flash her teeth in it though. She had always been conscious not to open her mouth since it had happened. She didn't want to give anyone else nightmares like the ones that she suffered from.

After leading Kyna from the room, they walked through numerous different streets until they came across a building that looked to be like barracks. He held open the door and waited for Kyna to enter first. Tristan paused in the corridor though, and Kyna used the opportunity to look around the room. She immediately noticed the high ceiling and reddish, carpeted floor that led a pathway through it. Off the corridor though, there were four doors, equally spaced from each other.

"This room is mine," Tristan began, gesturing to the first door on their left.

"The one opposite is Dagonet's. Next to me, is Lancelot. And your room is the one that's left."

Kyna nodded slightly, but she didn't move. Tristan had made sure that she had a room, and not just that, but one that was close to his. It was more than she could ever have asked for really. And everything that everyone was doing for her- the kindness they were giving her... She just wasn't used to it.

"Kyna?"

She flashed her deep brown eyes up at her brother, and tried not to look as overwhelmed with everything as she felt. Kyna gave him another small smile, and Tristan guided her toward the room that would from now on be hers. When he pushed open the door, Kyna walked inside. Her eyes trailed over the room and its little contents.

There was a reasonable sized table that stood under the room's one small window and a single chair that was pushed up into the furthest corner of the room. What caught her eye though, was the bed in the middle of the room, covered in a sheet of dark material. It had been a long time since she'd slept in something that looked as comfortable as that looked to be.

Tristan saw his sister move over to the table and lean on it to write something on another slip of paper. Her expression was confusing, as if she could not decide what emotion that she really felt.

_** First; thank you. For everything.**_

The quiet Knight was about to answer when Kyna lowered her charcoal to the paper once more.

___**And now**__** Tristan... There's not much I can say... I'm sorry about the letter- I didn't mean-**_

"Sorry about the letter?" Tristan interrupted in his deep, quiet voice.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there to stop what happened."

His tone was regretful; a tone that Kyna had rarely ever heard slip into her brother's voice. She shook her head at once and continued to write.

_** If you were there, they would have killed you. For that, at least, I am glad that you were here.**_

She turned back to him in time to see Tristan seem to frown. Kyna just stared at him, trying to work out what he was thinking.

_**It's in the past now. I'm just glad to have finally found you.**_

He read her words and nodded. Neither were the type of person to wallow in grief and self-pity. Both wanted to look to the now instead of the past.

_**What's it like here?**_

Kyna saw Tristan's lip twitch as he read the question. She'd seen him do that many times before; it meant that he wasn't happy, and that her question was not well received. She hadn't really expected it to be. He'd been taken from his home and forced to kill people who were simply defending theirs. Why would anyone truly like that?

"We cope," he answered simply, using the word she'd used to describe her life in her letter.

A small smile came to her lips, turning the corners upward slightly. A silent pause grew between them; him not knowing how to fill it, and her unable to.

"What happened with the Woads?" Tristan asked finally.

Kyna frowned, remembering her encounter with the blue demons that were native to the land that her brother had been sent to.

_**At a village I stopped in for supplies and directions, I was told that the quickest way to the Wall- to you- was through a forest, but I was warned against it. I was foolish enough not to listen to the naysayers, and rode through, thinking that I could handle myself. I was ambushed by those, what did you call them? Woads?**_

Tristan nodded.

_**I fought and killed a few but there were too many, so I tried to ride free of them. They followed me, of course. It was pure luck that those Knights, Gawain and Dagonet, found me, I think.**_

Tristan didn't say anything. He would always owe both Gawain and Dagonet for being there for his sister and likely saving her life. _Always_. Kyna paused for a moment before continuing.

_**I had to write that letter- before, I mean. I had to write it because I wanted you to know what happened- no matter how much it hurt- because I didn't want you to go home and never know.**_

She paused.

_**I hope that makes sense.**_

Tristan nodded slowly. He understood what his sister had been trying to do; he was just glad that she was still alive. Glad that he still had a part of his home left and that she was here so that he could protect her.

_**One thing I was a little unsure of though, was that if you'd be able to read my letter.**_

Tristan gave her another nod and explained, "When we were brought here, they taught us to read and write. Arthur made them; he says that all men should be equal."

It was Kyna's turn to nod though she did so a little bemusedly, now even more confused by the half-Roman, half-Briton commander that she'd only heard whisperings about. Arthur really made no sense to her. He was so unlike any other Roman that she'd met before.

"I should make sure that everything's alright with-" he began hesitantly, but stopped as Kyna nodded again.

_** Go. I'll stay here.**_

"You're sure?" Tristan asked, still reluctant to leave his sister.

_** Yes. I'm tired. It's been a long ride. I think I'll try to sleep for a while.**_

Tristan nodded, and after embracing his sister, he left the room.

"I'll return soon," was all he said before he was gone.

Kyna stared at the door as it closed, a smile playing on her lips. The woman placed her bag on the floor beside the bed and steadily moved to the side of it. As she slumped down upon the bed, Kyna couldn't remember the last time that she'd felt something so soft. She thought back to what she'd written to Tristan; "_**It's been a long ride**_."

And it really had. Not just across the country that her brother had been stationed in. But she'd really been riding since she ran from the Roman who'd bought her. And she'd finally stopped with her brother, where she should be.

She hadn't seen Tristan for almost fifteen years. And she'd missed him so much. Kyna was glad now that he had been in Britain; that he was alive. So many others weren't. Tristan was here now, and so many others weren't. She wasn't alone anymore. That in itself gave her the comfort she'd longed for since the day Tristan had been taken from their home.

For once, Kyna's life had taken a positive turn, and she realised this as she smiled into the soft, feathery pillow.


	3. People Are Strange

After leaving Kyna's room and closing the door softly behind him, Tristan had headed for the tavern. It wasn't the place that he really wanted to be at the moment, but it was the place that he knew that the others would most likely be. And for some reason, that made him want to avoid the tavern all the more.

When he arrived at the tavern, the other Knights were seated around their usual corner table. He could immediately tell that they were less rowdy than they usually were; it seemed that the arrival of his sister and the news that she brought had affected them all more than they'd like to admit.

It wasn't hard to determine why either. All of them had worried that such things would happen to their families; and that it _had_ happened to Tristan's family would only increase their fears for their own. They all looked up at Tristan as he stopped between Arthur and Bors.

"So is everything... alright?" Gawain asked before Tristan could speak.

Tristan answered simply in the form of a small nod, not thinking anything of Gawain's quick interest in his sister's well-being- he and Dagonet _had,_ after all, been the ones to find her. But on seeing that the Knights were seemingly looking for more of a reply from him- though they probably didn't expect one from their usually silent scout- Tristan offered one up.

"She's resting," he added.

Most of the Knight's nodded on hearing this and seemed to relax slightly. It was Arthur though that spoke next and said something in a solemn and serious voice that did not exactly surprise the Knights, but acted more as a confirmation of their own thoughts.

"Your sister is welcome here for as long as she wishes to stay."

And Arthur had said it loud enough so that all in the tavern could have, and _did_ hear him. It was a simple message to those who lived in the Fort that Kyna was under the Knights' protection and should be treated with respect. They all knew how those at the Fort treated outsiders- particularly Sarmatian ones.

With only another small nod at Arthur, Tristan turned and moved off to where Vanora stood behind the bar top. The pretty red-head smiled as he approached. Tristan didn't speak much and wasn't particularly friendly, but she always thought a smile was welcome- whether he showed that it was or not. He gave her a bob of his head in greeting and asked her if Bors had spoken to her about having any clothes that she might have left over that Kyna could wear.

Of course, Bors had already told Vanora about Kyna arriving at the Fort, and he had told her of what had happened to drive her to make such a journey to Britain. So Vanora's smile broadened in an ever-motherly fashion as she bent under the bar top. And when she reappeared from behind it, she was carrying a pile of dresses.

"I had One run home and collect them," she explained as she handed them over to the quiet Knight.

After thanking her, and picking up a couple of apples, Tristan left the tavern quickly. It was too loud in there for him to want to stay. Not after he'd just found out that his family, all of his village, in fact, were dead, and had been for some time. Only his little sister had survived.

And, for some reason that he couldn't fathom, he was happy that she was in Britain, so close to him- something he despised himself for thinking. Britain was an awful place that he had been forced to, and many others that had been with him originally had died on. He didn't understand why he'd ever be glad that his sister was in such a place.

As he walked through the streets of the Fort something in the sky caught his attention. The hawk. Not _his_ hawk, as so many insisted on calling her. She was free; unlike Tristan. As she landed on his outstretched arm, Tristan couldn't help but let out a long and silent sigh.

He stroked two fingers down the bird's feathery breast and wished that he and his sister could be as free as she was. Though he knew that that was just a wish, and reality waited in the form of his sister, who'd faced as much, if not more, pain and suffering than he and the other Knights. So he let the hawk fly free and continued on his way to give his sister the clothes that Vanora had given him.

He found Kyna asleep when he knocked and, refusing to wake her, Tristan placed the pile of dresses on top of the table in the corner of the room. The Knight found himself pausing a moment though, just beside his sister. Almost as if he was testing that she _was_ really there. He scribbled down a small note and left it on the side where he was sure that she would find it.

The next morning, Kyna sat in the metal tub, revelling in the heat of the water. She was glad that Tristan had left her a note explaining that he had asked someone to prepare a bath for her in her own room. It was much better than having to use public baths; she didn't like being naked when there was a possibility that she might be in front of people. Kyna was so much more comfortable when away from the eyes of others.

Raising her arm from the steaming water, droplets trickled from her elbow. She pushed her dark hair back from her face and sank down into the bath, submerging herself in its emanating warmth. Kyna's deep brown eyes scrunched closed against the heat and water, and she felt her long hair swirl around her face.

She stayed immersed in the water for as long as she could, enjoying the way that the water caressed her body with its warm and comforting touch. But when she felt as if she could bear it no longer, Kyna sat up and took in a large and deep breath.

Another sharper breath followed though, as her attention was distracted from her private breath when the door opened behind her. The woman's eyes went wide and she froze, drops of warm water tracing pathways down her skin.

"Kyna? Tristan wants-" Gawain froze too, midsentence, as he caught sight of the woman in the metal tub.

He recovered himself and turned as quickly as possible, hoping that Kyna would see that he wasn't taking advantage of the situation he'd just inadvertently walked into. He most definitely did not want her to think that- and it was most likely that she _would_ considering her past experiences with men.

"I'm so sorry," Gawain apologised.

"I- I did knock," he added defensively.

Kyna finally turned her head to the golden-haired Knight behind her, a dark glare fixed upon her face. But when she saw that Gawain had turned away from her, that expression completely vanished. Instead, it was replaced by a look of confusion, one of her dark eyebrows raising high.

_That's a first_, Kyna thought. _Not many men would look away given so obvious a chance to leer at a woman's body... Perhaps he's a better person than I took him for... _She continued to stare at the Knight for a while before the next thought crept its way into her mind. _Perhaps they all are..._

But she moved then, leaving her thoughts, along with the warm water, behind in the metal tub. Kyna stood and stepped out onto the cold wooden floor. Swirling the towel that whoever filled the tub had left for her around herself, Kyna watched the Knight carefully.

She saw that Gawain had shut the door to stop any others from unwittingly walking in on the scene as he had. But now he stood with his back toward her, his hands held awkwardly. To her, Gawain seemed odd. Indeed, all the Knights were odd. They were so... _respectful_ of her, even though they had only just met her.

Respect. That was something that she hadn't had for such a long time. But here it was, right in front of her in the form of the long-haired Knight with his back to her. She almost smiled. But instead, Kyna knotted the material covering her body to ensure that it didn't fall before tapping Gawain on the shoulder. It was meant as a signal that she felt she was sufficiently covered.

Gawain turned, but she noticed immediately that his blue eyes were still averted from her body. Kyna did give him a small smile then, and moved to find her paper.

"I'm sorry. I truly didn't mean to," Gawain apologised again.

Kyna simply shook her head and fumbled with the piece of charcoal that she'd just picked up.

_** I think I was under the water when you knocked.**_

Realisation dawned on the Knight's face and he replied, "Ah, right. Well, next time I'll wait until _you _open the door.

He paused and added, "I would have now, but Tristan said you might have been sleeping."

_**It's fine. Just please, next time, will you wait for me to give you some sort of answer before you just blindly walk in?**_

"It's a promise," Gawain answered, his eyes meeting hers and holding their truth before her.

Kyna nodded and began to write again.

_** There was something you wanted?**_

Gawain blinked.

"Er, yes. Tristan wanted to know if you'd like to come for breakfast. He had to head out early to scout, but he should be back soon."

Kyna looked at the Knight for a moment before giving him a nod.

Gawain smiled and then replied, "I'll wait outside for you to get dressed."

And with that he exited the room, leaving Kyna as bemused as when he'd turned away from her before. _I'm really going to have to get used to being treated so well_, she thought, still pondering on how different the Knights were to the people she'd been around for so long.

Kyna dressed quickly in one of the dresses that Tristan had left for her. She'd have to remind herself to thank Tristan when she saw him, because everything he'd done was perfect. The dresses were beautiful, and soft like she couldn't believe. And, after slipping into her boots and belting her dagger around her waist, Kyna grabbed her paper and charcoal and opened the door to find Gawain standing outside as if he was guarding her door.

She almost smiled again as she tapped him on the shoulder for the second time that day. The golden-haired Knight turned to see Kyna fully dressed, though still with slightly wet hair hanging down her back in dark waves.

"Come. I'll take you to the tavern," he said with a sideways grin as they set off.

Kyna noticed how he hadn't offered his hand to escort her; nor did he make any move to touch her. It was just another odd thing for her to experience; someone understanding how she felt so quickly after meeting her. _These Knights are just full of surprises..._ she thought as she walked after Gawain.

It didn't take then long to reach the tavern, but Kyna was busy memorising every path as they passed by. She was good at remembering things. But the reason she was trying to remember everything they passed was because she liked to know where everything was. She liked to know where every possible escape route was. Not that she expected to need an escape route at the Fort, but she thought that it was just nice to know where she _could _find one, _should_ she need one.

When they arrived at the tavern, Gawain directed her to a table in the corner where all of the men that she'd seen at the Round Table the previous day were seated. Her brother was not, however. A slight frown arched her brows as she stood beside Gawain until she felt a hand on her shoulder.

Kyna's head snapped around and she flinched away from the hand, almost knocking into Gawain in the process. She almost drew the small dagger that she kept belted at her waist too; that was, until she realised that the hand belonged to her brother.

"I'm sorry," Tristan said in response to his sister's reaction, his face quite impassive.

She nodded, trying to wipe the frown from her expression. She succeeded in a manner and allowed Tristan to lead her to the corner table. Gawain followed and sat down beside Galahad, whilst Kyna took a seat between her brother and Lancelot. She looked a little uncomfortable to be sat at a table of men, and, in fact, she felt it too. But Kyna hid her feelings as well as she could and instead turned to write something.

_** Thank you for the dresses. They're perfect.**_

Tristan gave a small nod and replied, "Vanora got them for you."

Kyna frowned and was about to write that she didn't know who Vanora was, when, as if on cue, the pretty red-haired woman approached them. Tristan held up a hand indicating that she was the woman for Kyna to thank; but just before she held up the same note she'd just shown Tristan, she paused.

_** Can she**_-Kyna wrote, meaning to ask Tristan whether Vanora would be able to read what she'd written.

But the slightly older woman, who was standing beside her with a jug of water and a few glasses, stopped her before she'd written the end of the sentence.

"I can, dear."

Kyna gave a small smile, but something must still have shown in her expression that made Vanora explain.

"As soon as I found out that Bors knew how to read and write, I'd be damned if I didn't learn," she whispered with a wide grin.

"Hang on a second!" Bors interjected; his voice far louder than it needed to be.

"_Well_-" Vanora started, before she found herself being pulled into the lap of her lover.

Kyna looked away, slightly uncomfortable. It was not that she thought that Vanora wasn't happy to be with Bors, because Kyna could clearly see that she was from the smile on the woman's face. But the way that he had pulled her to him brought back memories that Kyna hated to think about. So when Vanora finally disentangled herself from Bors, Kyna looked up and passed her the note that she'd originally written for her brother.

"Don't mention it, love," Vanora answered, still smiling.

And in a motherly-like fashion, she added, "And, just so you know, if you ever need any help with anything, I'll most likely be here."

Kyna returned the smile fully that time, but hidden beneath her features, she couldn't help but remain confused. _There it is again. They're all being so kind to me_, she thought. It was such a strange feeling to her, that even though she'd told herself that it just appeared to be how these people were, she still couldn't get used to it.

Vanora soon brought food over for the group and as everyone ate, Kyna listened to all that they had to say. She started to learn each Knight's name properly, along with distinctive features about them from the stories that they were telling of their exploits over the years.

Playful banter swung across the table, and it was almost nice for Kyna just to bear witness to it. But all the while she sat with them, her mind was half preoccupied. If any of the Knights had been paying attention, which they all secretly were, they would have noticed that every time Kyna open her mouth to eat, her hand covered it. They would have seen how much Kyna disliked eating in front of people from the slight look in her deep brown eyes.

And as Gawain subtly watched Kyna, he tried to hide his emotions from his features. He had to give the siblings credit, for it was a harder task than both Tristan and Kyna made it look. But, for the moment, he had to school himself in the art. Because he hated to see how Kyna was uncomfortable in so simple a thing as eating because of what had been done to her.

And because as much as he had tried not to look at Kyna's body when he'd accidentally walked in on her bathing, it was impossible for him not to have seen the scars lining her back. It seemed that all types of scars littered her skin in lines meant to create permanent reminders of the pain they'd caused her.

And Gawain couldn't help but feel angered at the injustices performed upon the sister of his brother in arms. But as he'd come to realise over the years, life wasn't fair. And as a Sarmatian Knight he'd also come to realise that there was nothing he could do about it _but_ get angry.


	4. Exploration

The Knights continued their morning as they would have done. After eating in the tavern, the group were set to get to their usual training routine. Kyna went with them, though she had absolutely no intention of joining them in their training. She knew that Tristan would not leave her now, but she also knew that his training was a vital part of keeping him alive. So if that was where her brother had to go, then that would be where she would go too.

She walked beside Tristan as he and the other Knights made their way out to the field they usually trained in, atop a small hill. The air was cold, but Kyna didn't mind; she'd suffered through a lot colder than the British air in her lifetime. She even thought it pleasant as it coolly blew past her face, whipping her hair slightly in the direction of the wind.

Kyna took a seat at the base of a tree at the edge of the field so that she could watch the Knights train without getting in their way. But as she did, she heard one of the Knights laughing at her. She stared at the youngest Knight, one who could only be a few years older than her, and her features formed into a frown.

"That's one way to tell they're siblings, less than a day here and she's already stealing his spot," he laughed to Gawain, who stood beside him.

Kyna's frown deepened as she struggled to understand Galahad's meaning. A smiling Gawain explained for her though.

"Your brother always sits there."

Realisation dawned in the woman's expression, but she made no other movement to acknowledge Galahad's joke. She only gave a slight and thankful nod to the golden-haired Knight, before turning to look to the others, who had already begun to train. Her brother was among them.

Galahad had moved over to where Tristan stood, bow raised. The two Knights were obviously the only ones who particularly chose to fight with a bow and arrow, Kyna noted, as they were the only ones to have brought those weapons with them.

It came as no surprise that her brother was a proficient in using a bow, because she had seen him use one expertly even when they were children. In fact, he had been the one to first start teaching _her_ how to use a bow. But as she watched her brother and Galahad shoot at a tree far in the distance, a tree that she guessed she might _just_ be able to hit, she was amazed at how good they really were.

Even as she turned her gaze to the other Knights, who were practicing in areas that they were more accustomed to fighting in, she couldn't help but watch in wonder. They were so skilled. So deadly.

It made her glad that these were the men her brother had been fighting with all these years; it made her glad that they were all so expertly trained that the likelihood of them being killed in battle was significantly less than she thought it could have been.

But, of course, the peace that held Kyna entranced by the Knights' swift and fluid motions was broken with a short question from the Knight she had learned was called Lancelot.

"Why don't you join us?" he suggested.

Kyna blinked and shook her head slowly. She had _not_ come to fight. She had come to _watch_, and nothing more.

_** The only time I fight is when I **__**have**__** to**_, Kyna wrote quickly.

"Come on, you have to keep up your skills," he tried again.

How he even knew that she _had _skills was a mystery to her, but Kyna shook her head once more.

_** Trust me, I've have enough practice over the years**_, she wrote, hoping that that would be enough to stop his attempts to have her join them in their training.

Because, really, fighting was the last thing that Kyna wanted to be doing. She'd spent half of her life fighting, and she didn't need to be doing it unnecessarily.

"Drop it, Lancelot," Kyna heard Dagonet say before the dark-haired Knight could open his mouth to try and persuade her again.

Kyna threw a thankful glance in the direction of the tall Knight and settled back to resume her watch of the Knights as they practiced. And at her sudden ignorance of him, Lancelot turned back to his own training. Kyna was more than grateful at that. As much as these Knights were different from most men she'd met, _that_ one was just a little too persistent for Kyna's liking.

Later, the group returned to the Fort. And, while the men went to bathe and clean themselves of the dirt and sweat covering their bodies from their training session, Kyna decided to take a walk around the Fort. Though she only did so after wasting much paper on convincing her brother to let her go, and by assuring him that she'd have her dagger with her and at the ready, regardless of how safe the Fort should be for her.

There were an awful lot of Roman guards around the Fort- not that Kyna was surprised by that fact; it _was _a Roman Fort after all. But Kyna didn't like the look of them. They all either just seemed to look at her as if she was beneath them, or as if she was something to leer at; and Kyna well knew what followed looks like either of those.

So she avoided those men as best she could and kept to herself. As Kyna passed through the Fort though, she found that the Roman soldiers were not the only ones looking at her. The rest of the Fort's inhabitants, it seemed, were just as content to blatantly stare at her and gossip about the sister of the quiet, Sarmatian Knight. _I'm mute, not deaf_, Kyna thought with a frown as she tried to ignore the stares and too-loud whispers that followed her.

In an attempt to get away from the whispers as well as those uncomfortable stares, Kyna climbed the stone steps of the Wall. A man stepped out to stop her and she froze, not knowing what to expect of the man. But when he caught sight of the tattoos on her face, the soldier seemed to reconsider, stepping backward again to let her pass.

_Odd_, she thought, but nodded to him and walked on anyway. _They must think_ _Tristan's scarier than I'd thought_, she mused, hiding a smirk beneath her usual mask of straight features.

Kyna turned to look at the Fort. From where she stood, she could see everything. The entire structure of the Fort. Its turns and alleyways; every route that it was possible to take. And Kyna sought to memorise it immediately. There were three exits to the Fort, all of them blocked with guards and gates. Two of them led South, in the direction she'd arrived from, and those gates were smaller than the third gate.

That gate, which was located to her left, Kyna noticed, was far larger than the others; thicker, even. It was almost as if the wood there was far more heavily reinforced than the others. So Kyna continued to walk along the top of the Wall until she came to where the larger gate was.

There were a number of Roman guards standing atop it, looking out into the wilderness beyond, so Kyna didn't get too close. But from where she was, she could see the spikes on the outer side of the gate. And the large horses on the inside that were the only thing that could pull it open.

Kyna found it almost interesting to see what looked like an impenetrable defence that the Romans had built to protect themselves from the natives of the land. She turned back to look at the wilderness beyond, her fingers resting on the huge, stone blocks that had been used to build the Wall and sighed.

_If only the Romans didn't have such vast aspirations... Then Tristan never would have been here all this time. He'd never have been taken in the first place. And there wouldn't have been the need for a wall that stopped the country's own inhabitants from crossing it_, Kyna thought, her mind racing over impossibilities as she stared at nothing.

It didn't take Tristan long to find where his sister had wandered to. He didn't have to ask anyone, he just tracked her footsteps. Though he could hear the whispers that sprung as he passed. All related to Kyna's arrival at the Fort; and they told him that those he heard had seen his sister. Whether those he walked by had tried to be quiet about it or not, Tristan's expert ears heard them talking.

It didn't necessarily bother him to hear them speak about him; he'd grown used to it over the years. When it came to his sister, however, that was another matter. As long as the Fort's inhabitants knew that Kyna was _his_ sister though, he was content to let them comment. Spreading that his sister was at the Fort, would also spread the fact that Kyna was under the protection of the silent, deadly scout that he knew they already feared.

Tristan found Kyna seated, cross-legged, atop of the wall. She seemed to be looking quite intently out over into Woad territory, her expression set and focussed. None of the guards bothered her as she sat there- obviously, they had recognised her as his sister and were smart enough to stay away from her.

"You shouldn't sit there," he said quietly.

Kyna blinked and turned her head. She met his eye for a moment before flashing a small, questioning glance his way.

"It's dangerous... You might fall," he added.

The Knight's sister shook her head at him in reply and he watched as she unravelled another bit of paper.

_** Not so, brother. I've been in many, more precarious situations than this**_, she wrote quickly.

"Even so. I'd prefer it if you came down."

A small, mischievous smile that reminded Tristan of the sister he'd left in Sarmatia crossed her expression for a fleeting moment as she twisted her body and hopped down from her perch on top of the wall.

_** Better?**_ Kyna scribbled.

Tristan answered with a nod and a small smile settled on his usually unreadable face. Though the expression soon vanished as the two siblings turned and began walking in the direction that they'd both come from.

"Find anything interesting?" Tristan asked after a while.

Kyna gave him a sideways glance before shaking her head.

"No... I discovered that within a day of being here too."

_**Is this really how it is all the time?**_ Kyna wrote, not pausing in her stride to do so.

She'd had enough practice to be able to write almost expertly without even properly looking around at her surroundings. And that didn't escape Tristan's notice, though he said nothing about it.

"Yes," he replied simply.

Kyna tilted her head at him, but wrote nothing in reply. The two just continued to walk around the Fort, with Kyna soaking in every detail that she could. It was almost odd for her to see the place that her brother had lived in for the years he'd been away from home. _Then again_, she supposed, _he'd probably find it odd to see the places I've been... Or worse_.

"Kyna?"

Tristan's voice snapped her out of her thoughts, and her deep eyes, flickered to his. The pensive expression that had been on her face had led him to speak, his voice filled with concern for his sister. Kyna merely shook her head in an attempt to brush off the memories of the past.

She could see the apprehension still in his otherwise mysterious gaze and tried to ignore it by continuing their walk. But Tristan quickly caught her elbow and pulled her back. Kyna froze. Tristan was probably the only man that she would allow to do such a thing; that she trusted completely. Yet the movement still made her tense. And Tristan noticed it, immediately releasing her elbow.

"You know you can talk to me, Kyna?" he said, his words more of a statement than a question.

"If you need to," he added.

Kyna blinked. How her brother knew her so well, even after all the time that they'd spent separated, still astounded her. She almost smiled at him, the expression masking what was left of her worries.

_** I know**_, she wrote quickly.

_**Thank you, brother. But I would not speak of such things. They would only hurt us both.**_

Her hand rose, and she took hold of Tristan's arm. With a small squeeze, Kyna tried to reassure her brother. She knew that the gesture would not work as she wished it to, but she refused to dwell further on the past that she'd escaped from. And she refused to reveal anything of what she'd been through to Tristan. He'd been through enough without her worries added on top of that.

They walked on; both siblings' faces a mask unreadable to anyone. Silence stretched between them, a non-sound that both were used to. Kyna tried to forget about the thoughts running through her head, and instead turned to take in more details of the Fort.

Regardless of the facade she masked herself with, Tristan could still see the pain hidden beneath her expression. And it bothered him more than anything else ever could have. More than the fact that he and his brothers had been taken from their homes. More than the fact that he had spent the last fourteen and a half years killing for a cause not his own.

Tristan let out a silent sigh as he looked sideways at his sister. And he couldn't help but think that if he ever got a hold of those responsible for hurting Kyna, then they would experience more pain than they had ever bestowed on her. _That_, he would guarantee.

**Author's Note: Well, there really is no excuse for such long absence on my part. All I can say is that I have had **_**such**_** bad writer's block on this fic and I let it go on far too long. Really, really sorry guys. :/**

**On a brighter note, I just passed my A levels and got into University. :D So you guys finally get a chapter that has been half written for a very long time, and that I only just managed to finish this morning. :) Hopefully my awful updating track record will improve. :) And hopefully you'll enjoy this chapter. :)**

**Kit xx**


	5. Temper Control

A week past with Kyna living at the Fort. She had slowly become more accustomed to her life there, as had the inhabitants of the Fort. Whispers that still followed her wherever she went were fewer in number as the gossipers had become more accustomed to her presence.

Though those who lived in the Fort had become more familiarised with her, Kyna was no more comfortable than she had been the day she'd been brought to the Fort. The kindness of the Knights and Vanora still caught her off guard, while she was used to keeping herself wary of Roman soldiers and others that she did not know.

Despite the fact that Tristan constantly assured her that she was safe, Kyna never failed to belt her dagger around her waist. She didn't want to take any chances. Past experience had taught her what dangers lay in being unarmed. _A little mistake like that could cost much_, she thought, lightly running her fingers over the hilt of the small blade.

Kyna sighed as she looked around her. She'd taken to walking the Fort each day when her brother absented himself, either when scouting or doing some other service required of him. And she'd found that she soon knew most of the Fort in that short week. There was an obvious contrast in parts of the Fort. Some places were built up with wealthy, colourful villas, yet others looked more like poor huts, weather-beaten and small.

It hadn't taken Kyna long to discover which roads or alleys that she should travel down. There were clear signs that warned away from certain places- and her years of travelling had taught her to notice them immediately. The alley behind the building that she and Tristan slept in, for example, was filled with shadows and notable places for someone to conceal themselves in. It would be a place to avoid, in any case.

Kyna shrugged as she headed to the tavern, in a route that was filled with many people, and route that Tristan himself had shown her. _That would be safe_, she thought; of course, Kyna was always on guard no matter how _safe_ somewhere might have been.

When she'd walked through the street she kept herself to herself as she always had. But she could still hear people talking about her. The Knights had been informing her of the numerous people who had been questioning them about her too.

Kyna didn't know why so many people were enquiring after her. _Curiosity_, she guessed. As in, _she_ was a curiosity, not that they were not simply curious about the Sarmatian scout's sister. She didn't speak. She was pretty, but scarred. And she was _Tristan's_ sister. Kyna knew that that was what they saw.

And she was also well aware of what they didn't see. The hurt. The pain. The do-not-touch-or-you'll-be-sorry look that she gave anyone that came within five feet of her. That look that had in the past been so easily ignored.

All except the Knights, that was. _They_ saw. But they _knew_. They understood the wariness and caution in every one of her measured movements. And they were careful to adhere to any boundary she should set.

Since arriving at the Fort, Kyna had done her best to keep her temper- more like her fears- under control. She constantly had to watch herself in case she should accidentally misinterpret or overreact to a situation. And she was doing well- or so she'd thought.

Kyna had walked into the tavern expecting to find her brother and his fellow Knights. However, when she approached the table that the men all-too-frequently sat at, she discovered it empty. _They must still be training_, Kyna thought, moving over to take the seat that she'd so often claimed as hers.

Her plan was to wait for the Knights to arrive, merely watching the crowd that she noticed almost always watching her. It seemed that someone else had other ideas though.

Kyna saw him coming even before he started making his way over to the table where she alone sat. A flickering of panic flashed through her as she noted the way he strutted in her direction. It reminded her of men that she'd rather forget. The only thing that could have alarmed Kyna further would have been if the man had been Roman. Thankfully, he appeared not to be- not that that helped Kyna to stay her fears and calm her heart.

She wasn't entirely certain that his movement in her direction was because of her until he turned and placed his hands on the table that only a few ever sat at. This man's threat level went up dramatically in Kyna's eyes as soon as he stopped walking and his hands made contact with the wood of the table in front of her, where he then leaned confidently.

All Kyna did was stare at the man, whose eyes were obviously settled on her face. Surely this man wasn't about to try what she thought he was, was he?

"Hello," he said, his voice deep and obviously attempting to be flirtatious.

The effort only made Kyna frown at him.

"I noticed that you were new to the Fort; I thought I could buy you a drink," he finished, raising his eyebrows suggestively at her.

Kyna scowled as she scribbled down the words, _**Not interested**_, and flashed the paper at him. The man's expression quickly turned confused and he faltered slightly.

"Sorry, I don't read," he shrugged.

"You could just talk to me though."

Kyna shook her head at the man, her frustration increasing tenfold. If he didn't get the message soon then she was going to have to make him understand. As the man pulled out a chair beside her and took a seat, Kyna couldn't stop her lip from twitching. He clearly wasn't understanding that she didn't want him anywhere near her.

"Determined to be silent then? I guess I can deal with that; so about that drink, you could just nod, you know?"

She scowled at him and shook her head slowly again. If he didn't leave soon then she could hardly be called responsible for her actions. Surely the Knights, her brother especially, had made it clear enough that coming near her was not a good idea... Even that she was sat at their corner table should have been some sort of warning sign. _Or perhaps he's just that stupid..._ she thought as she tried to stop herself from physically hurting the man who didn't understand a simple 'no'.

"You know," he tried again, causing Kyna to silently groan.

He clearly was not about to leave her alone any time soon.

"It always amazes me how you women like to play so coy to attract a man."

That's_ what he thinks I'm doing? Maybe he _needs_ to be hit, just to knock some sense into that thick skull_, she thought. But as the man moved to lean in closer to her, Kyna felt that her personal space had just been entirely too violated. She couldn't have stopped herself from doing what she did next even if she'd had someone there to hold her back.

Her fist collided into the unsuspecting man's jaw so hard that it knocked him from the chair that Kyna thought he shouldn't have been sat on anyway. A lot of eyes settled on them very quickly, and to save any further action, Kyna stood and ran out of the tavern.

She ran so quickly that she didn't even notice that she passed the Knights on their way into the tavern. _They_ noticed; and though they didn't know why she was running, they would soon find out. Whilst the others headed straight inside the tavern to determine what had just happened, Dagonet had to pull Tristan back from heading directly after her. Tristan turned back to his brother with an expression like thunder.

"Find out why first," Dagonet reasoned.

Wrenching his arm from the taller Knight's grasp, Tristan followed his brothers into the tavern. It didn't take long to determine the cause of Kyna's swift exit. Vanora was busy scowling at a man stood beside their usual table, holding his bleeding nose, and her voice carried enough to let the whole tavern understand what had happened.

The way that she was scolding the man was like she was yelling at one of her children. And in Tristan's opinion, it wasn't nearly harsh enough. As soon as he'd heard the reason for his sister's departure though, he left the tavern before Dagonet could even turn and tell him to go.

Tristan headed in the direction that he'd seen her run off in and followed the tracks he knew to be hers from where he'd lost sight of her. It didn't take him long to find her, standing on the wall of the Fort, looking outward intently. Tristan frowned as he saw her standing there; the expression on her face as unreadable as the mask he'd long ago learnt to wear.

He went to her, his hand reaching out to rest on her shoulder. But when his hand touched her shoulder, Kyna twisted her body out of reach and her fist shot out. Tristan barely escaped the brunt of her blow, but her knuckles still brushed against his jaw. As soon as Kyna realised what she'd done, she recoiled and put a hand over her mouth.

_** I'm so sorry. I just can't handle people sneaking up on me. It's a gut reaction. Sorry, I really didn't**_

"It's fine. I should have said something," Tristan said, understanding the reason she'd do such a thing and saving her from writing anymore.

"You're alright?" he asked, knowing that she would understand why he would ask her such a question.

In the slight moonlight, Tristan saw his sister's eyes flicker to the floor. She didn't want to look at him and to admit that she'd started feeling helpless like she had all those years ago. She merely shrugged, not knowing if she was alright or not.

"Kyna," Tristan said, trying to get her to look at him again.

Her eyes flashed back up to him and she stared at him without blinking.

_**I'm fine. I just don't like people... I don't like them getting to close. I don't know how to explain it.**_

"I understand," he said quietly.

Kyna tilted her head questioningly.

"What you've been through... I understand."

Despite the reminder of what had been done to her in the past, Kyna couldn't help but smile slightly that her brother understood her so well. She hadn't meant to punch the man in the tavern, nor her brother, but people touching her and people trying to talk to her in the way that that man had been... She wasn't very good at dealing with such things.

With what had happened to her, she didn't think that she could ever see herself as romantically involved with anyone. She was just abnormal, she supposed. A freak of nature. But she just didn't _want_ anything like that; even thinking of it made her shudder.

"I'll take you back to your room if you want," Tristan suggested when his sister had lapsed into a wondering silence that locked even her charcoal.

She blinked before shaking her head and then scribbling something down for him.

_**No. I'll go back to the tavern.**_

Tristan didn't comprehend why she wanted to go back to the tavern, not after the uproar that she had just caused, but he did not question her decision. He merely nodded and waited until she walked beside him back to the still-crowded tavern.

Kyna didn't explain her choice to her brother, though, in reality, she wanted to go back to the tavern because she couldn't stand the gossip that it would've caused had she not done. She'd rather face the crowd's reaction immediately, no matter how ridiculous it might be.

People stared, as she had known they would, when Kyna and her brother walked in; but glares from Tristan soon made them return to their own business. Kyna settled herself in her chair at the corner table, well aware that all of the Knights were trying to look at her without making it obvious.

She tried to offer them some semblance of a smile to show that she was alright, regardless of whether she felt that way or not. It was exceedingly transparent, but the Knights seemed to believe it was better than nothing.

The Knights' drinks were untouched, as if they had been waiting for Tristan and his sister to return so that they could ensure everything was alright. Where the man that she'd hit was, Kyna didn't know, she was just glad that she could see him. She didn't want to have to find out if he'd learnt his lesson or not. She just wanted to forget this night as she'd tried to forget so many others. Seemingly lost in thought, Kyna only looked up when Vanora appeared beside her.

"I'm so sorry, love. I didn't realise what was going on or I would have sent him away."

_**It's not your fault. The tavern was busy. How could you have known?**_

Vanora frowned at the younger woman.

"Still; it shouldn't have come to what it did."

Kyna shrugged. What had happened didn't bother her as much as what _could_ have happened. She was lost in her thoughts again for a moment before Vanora's giggle could snap her out of them.

_**What?**_

"You, know, I doubt that the poor man's nose will ever look the same again."

_** Well, he should've taken the hint.**_

"I don't think anyone else will try what he did."

_**Good. I don't want them too.**_

"Someday you might, love," Vanora said, patting Kyna gently on the shoulder.

"Anyway, at least he'll know not to try that again-"

"_Everyone_ in the tavern will know not to try that one," Galahad interrupted.

Kyna frowned and looked at him, confused, until he elaborated.

"Vanora gave him such an earful, I'm surprised he didn't go deaf," Lancelot chipped in.

Vanora good-naturedly frowned and was about to reply, when Bors cut in with, "You should try living with her and leaving your clothes on the floor. Nightmare."

He laughed, and the other Knights joined him. Even Kyna couldn't hold back a smile at the comment, and the tight-lipped reply from Vanora that followed.

"Well perhaps you should think about that before you go throwing your clothes everywhere then."

Bors shrugged jokingly and took another drink of whatever it was he had before him. Kyna's smile slipped somewhat, but she couldn't help thinking, as she sat there, how different this was. Had she done what she had before coming to the Fort then she would have been punished. It would have been her that had suffered the most for her actions; but here? Who knew.

**Author's Note: Sorry it's taken me... eight months (**_**woah**_**)... to update. I've been really busy with University. :/ Anyway, I hope you like the chapter and will let me know what you think! :)**

**Kit xx**


	6. It's What They Do

Since the event in the tavern, Kyna had become even more of a talking point in the Fort than she had been before. And she didn't like it. She hadn't realised that coming to find her brother would lead her into a place where more people took notice of her than not.

Kyna _hated_ being noticed. If she could just blend into the background and only be seen by her brother, and maybe the other Knights, then she would. But Kyna had no such luck. After she'd hit that man in the tavern- that she still believed she had been totally justified in doing- she just tried to stay away from anyone who wasn't a Knight.

The only person that she truly trusted was Tristan, but there was something about the Knights that made her feel somewhat... secure. Kyna didn't know if it was just that they were Sarmatian, or perhaps that they had spent so much time with her brother and that _he_ trusted them; but there was something so different about them that marked them from other people.

It was like they'd formed a sort of family out of the boys- now men- that the Romans had taken from their homes._ That_ she liked. _That_ she could deal with. They were almost making her feel as if she was just an estranged part of that family. It was... nice.

After another bought of gossiping whispers found her while she ate breakfast though, Kyna found herself sitting alone on the hill where the Knights usually trained. She knew that they weren't planning to train that day, but she enjoyed the silence, and being away from the many stares and murmurs that continuously followed her wherever she went.

She spent her morning and most of her afternoon leaning against the tree that she'd sat by the last time she'd been on that hill. Her fingers lightly pulled at pieces of grass, tearing at the soft green blades. She had her bow at her side just in case she needed it; but that was just a comfort. Kyna sighed. This was pleasant; doing nothing. Relaxing. _She_ thought it was anyway

"You probably shouldn't be out here alone."

At the sound of the familiar voice, Kyna's head snapped around to the direction it came from. She stared at the golden-haired Knight, who was walking alone up the hill toward her. She watched him for a while until he came to a stop beside her, when she then started to scribble down her reply.

_**I'll be fine.**_

Kyna knew that she could take care of herself; she had done- sort of- for years. And she did have her bow with her, after all.

"Still, I'm not sure that your brother would be too happy about it."

_**What he doesn't know can't hurt him**_, she wrote, a smile briefly gracing her features.

Gawain returned it and asked, "May I sit?"

Tilting her head to the side slightly, Kyna seemed to doubt herself in her answer- as if she couldn't make up her mind whether it was a good idea or not. Gawain did not push her to answer though, he merely waited until she came to a decision.

Eventually, Kyna nodded. She wouldn't normally agree to allow anyone to sit beside her if she had the choice, but that _something_ about the Knights had somehow endeared them to her. And she just couldn't see any reason to refuse Gawain. She just didn't mind so much that he sat down beside her; even if it was a little awkward.

"How are you?" he asked.

She stared at him blankly for a moment before shrugging.

_**The same as usual.**_

"That's good, isn't it?" he asked.

She shrugged again.

_**It's better than I have been.**_

She watched as a frown crossed over his face, but she couldn't understand it. And it seemed to linger for some time. In fact, it had started to make her feel uncomfortable, so she wrote down a question for him, perhaps to distract him from whatever was turning his expression so.

_**What do you Knights do when you're not fighting or training?**_

Gawain looked surprised at her question, as if it hadn't been something he'd been expecting her to ask at all. But his frown disappeared, and so did the stemming discomfort she was feeling. He ran a hand through his hair while he considered his reply.

"Not much of anything really..." he paused.

"Actually, it'd be better to say that we do anything we can; not nothing. Just to... keep busy, I don't know."

_**I don't follow.**_

"Well, we all have our ways of coping and... being here," Gawain started.

His words seemed to be coming disjointedly, as if the subject was a hard one to discuss. But he still seemed forthcoming enough so Kyna didn't withdraw her enquiry. She just nodded slowly and waited for him to continue.

"Your brother scouts, Bors has Vanora and his children, and Lancelot has his... _various_ women..." Gawain trailed off, a small smirk on his face.

_**What do you do?**_ she asked.

"Me? I guess I just spend my time making sure Galahad stays in line."

There was a long silence between the two of them, that Kyna eventually broke only by scribbling a reply.

_**That's hardly fair, surely, could he not**_

But Gawain cut her off with a shake of his head as he explained, "Galahad's the youngest of us. He's also the most volatile, if I don't help to keep him line sometimes then who knows what he'd do.

Frowning slightly, Gawain added, "Probably spend half his time wallowing,"

Kyna's expression mimicked that of the long-haired Knight.

_**But why is it **__**you**__** that takes care of him?**_

He opened his mouth to answer but then seemed to become genuinely conflicted. Something was bothering him. Something that he clearly wasn't willing to inform her about- and she had never been one to pry. Not when she carried so many hurtful secrets herself that she didn't want to be questioned about. Gawain merely shook his head again, avoiding the answer that he was almost considering giving her.

"It's just something I do," he answered eventually.

Kyna stared at him curiously. She could still see the pain in his expression that was quickly hidden away behind a smile. She knew all about that. But she couldn't help but wonder what secret Gawain was trying to mask away.

"Come, we should return to the Fort before your brother worries," Gawain said, his voice almost as cheerful as he wanted it to be.

He stood quickly and held an outstretched hand out to her. With a frown still colouring her expression, she took it and he helped her to her feet. They walked side by side with each other back to the Fort at a leisurely pace. Neither was in a rush despite what Gawain had said about Tristan worrying. Her brother wouldn't be all that worried, Kyna knew; she hadn't been gone for all that long anyway.

The guards opened the gates without protest, and the two entered the Fort- the place that now both Sarmatians had to call home. They remained in silence, simply because Kyna couldn't break it and Gawain didn't feel the need to.

That was until he came out with, "Your bow, can I see it?"

Kyna stared at him for a moment as if he'd just asked her to hack off a limb and hand it to him. But Gawain merely laughed at her expression.

"I'll take that as a no then," he grinned.

Kyna frowned at him. She'd never relinquished her bow to anyone since she'd acquired it. A real Sarmatian bow. It had been a stroke of luck that she'd come by it in all honesty. And the things she'd had to do to pay for it- well, it had almost taken her dignity and, in the end, she'd paid for it with another's blood. The blood of the man that had tried to induce her to use her body to pay for it, that was.

Kyna blinked back to reality where she noticed Gawain was looking at her intently; curiously. What would be the harm in letting him look- _just_ for a moment? she asked herself. _Tristan trusts him, right? And I... don't _not_ trust him..._

As they continued, Kyna slowly lifted the bow in her hand so that it was raised in front of him to take if he wished. What surprised her was that he _didn't_ take it from her. She watched as the Knight's eyes took in the dark wood bow and his fingers lightly traced over the curve of it. But he made absolutely no move to take it from her. Still walking, Gawain smiled and pushed the bow down, careful not to touch her.

"She's a beautiful bow," he said, his smile becoming maudlin.

"A piece of home."

She wasn't surprised to hear that he had recognised it as Sarmatian. It was similar to her brother's bow, but it wasn't quite the same. It wasn't made in her village like Tristan's was. Kyna tried to ignore that train of thought though, as she looked back to their route.

She and Gawain arrived at the tavern to find it empty of Knights but full of others. Kyna met Gawain's eye for a second before they tried to navigate their way through the crowded tavern to the corner table, Gawain in the lead. They only made it half the way there before a fight broke out between two of the tavern's very drunken patrons.

And Kyna managed to get herself caught in the middle of it. The two men fighting pushed people into more people, and pushed Kyna into a corner. A corner blocked off by a wall of human bodies that she immediately marked as hostile. It reminded her of things she'd give anything to have forgotten.

But rather than acting on the memory, Kyna froze. She didn't even appear to be aware that the men around her were even moving anymore, let alone fighting. Gawain noticed though. And he was quick to shove the men who were unwittingly pinning Kyna in place away from her. But that didn't snap Kyna out of her stunned state.

The shoving, pushing bodies and fighting fists had startled her into remembering the slavers that had once had control over her. A few of those sadistic bastards, as she called them, that used to beat her and fight each other for what their idea of fun. For amusement.

Kyna felt a pair of hands close around her upper arms which snapped her mind back into the present. Whoever was touching her brought more vivid memories back. A passing touch. A casual slap. A forceful push. A strong grip holding her down-

"Kyna?"

She blinked, trying to push away the memories that were flooding into her.

"Kyna? Kyna, look at me, I'm not going to let go of you until you look at me."

Gawain held her there until she met his eyes.

"Wait, calm down. It's going to be fine. Calm down.

She stared at him, finally actually seeing that it was Gawain, a Knight that her brother trusted, holding her, and not some slaver from a past that wouldn't leave her alone. Kyna stared at him, trying to calm the fast breaths that she hadn't noticed had quickened.

"It will be fine," Gawain repeated.

He was frowning at her. His anger at whatever in her past was causing her to act like this was growing by the second. But he knew that he had to calm her down over anything else. That was more important. The last time Kyna had felt threatened, she'd punched a man. Gawain had not seen her act like this before.

There was something so much worse about the way she'd frozen when those unknowing brawlers collided with her. It was like a shadow of her past had been draping itself over her like death shroud. And it seemed to take a while for her to emerge from herself again after that.

"Better?" Gawain asked eventually.

She nodded slowly as he released her. She could only stare at him while he backed away from her. Kyna was confused. She didn't realise it was possible for someone to be able to calm her down when she got like that- especially since he'd been touching her at the time. That had never happened before.

Kyna didn't understand it, so she ran out of the tavern- an occurrence that was becoming far too normal for her liking.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: Soooooo, hey. :) Hope you guys enjoy the chapter and will let me know what you think, 'cus I posted this and am now I'm slightly late for work... Woops...<strong>

**Kit xx**


	7. Misery Loves Company

Gawain watched her disappear from the tavern, the expression on her face now one more of confusion that pain; but the pain was still there. Whatever she'd been thinking about clearly hadn't entirely left her thoughts. But Gawain sensed that that wasn't the only thing bothering her, so he followed her.

With Kyna's speed, he was unable to catch her until she reached the stables. And he knew that he had to stop her there, because that was where her horse was, and he didn't know how badly what had just happened had affected her. Gawain couldn't bear the thought of her disappearing because of something like that little brawl in the tavern.

"Kyna, just stop for a second," he almost yelled after her.

She paused in the middle of the stables and not because she had nowhere left to run too. There was _always_ a place to run. But she stopped because she had a feeling that Gawain wasn't going to leave her alone until she did as he asked.

And regardless of whatever else she was feeling in that moment, she somehow didn't feel that Gawain was a danger to her. So there would be no harm in stopping- just to ensure he left her alone- would there?

"I know that I can't even begin to understand what happened to you; I know that. And I'm not going to tell you to talk to me about it, but don't run."

She turned around and stared at him. Running was what she did, who was he to say otherwise? And running had always worked as a safety for her in the past, so why should that change now?

"Misery loves company, right?" he said, moving around to sit down on one of the wooden platforms at the end of the stables.

She didn't even move to reply. Kyna didn't understand what he meant at all so she just watched him as he went to sit, her body turning again so that he was always directly in front of her.

"You asked me before why I spend my time making sure Galahad stays out of trouble. Well... Talking about this is hard..."

He paused for a moment, taking a deep inward breath. Kyna could have sworn she saw grief in his eyes. _What is he about to say?_ she wondered. It bothered her already- or made her uncomfortable, at least. It seemed like Gawain was about to reveal something that hurt him to think of, purely for her benefit, and she didn't like the thought of that. She didn't like it at all; but it didn't stop Gawain from continuing.

"I came here with my younger brother," he started.

"He was almost the same age as Galahad, a little older; but they became... good friends."

He smiled sadly at the memory, before his expression abruptly darkened.

"But my brother was... my brother was killed, three years ago now," he continued, a genuine pain now evident in his expression.

"It was an arrow. I couldn't have stopped it even if I'd seen it coming and he was... he died before I could get to him."

Gawain shook his head, as if trying to shake away the bad memory. Frowning, Kyna walked over to him and took a seat beside him. She wasn't directly beside him, but she was close enough to appear comforting without making herself feel incredibly uncomfortable. What he was telling her was horrible. She couldn't imagine being in the position he had been; watching his brother die. She repressed a shiver at the thought.

"I couldn't save him... but I swore from then on that I'd make sure that Galahad got home."

Even if she could have spoken, Kyna wouldn't have known what to say to that. She didn't know why he was telling her this. Why he was revealing so much to her?

Gawain sighed and said, "So, if you ever need to talk... I'll be here to listen."

Kyna didn't realise that a tear had slipped down her cheek until Gawain said, "May I?"

She turned her head slightly to see that his hand was held out to her face, intent on wiping away the tears that she hadn't noticed falling. He still wasn't touching her without her permission, even though the gesture was a kind one. But, blinking, Kyna brushed the tear away with the palm of her hand. No matter how kind he had meant it to me, she still wasn't entirely comfortable with allowing someone to touch her. Gawain said nothing though.

"Maybe I should walk you back to your room," he suggested, trying to take both of their minds off of what he had just admitted.

She shook her head slowly.

**_ I'd rather stay here._**

He nodded and stood.

"I'll leave you then. But please, remember what I said. If you ever need someone to talk to..."

Gawain was quick to head for the door, his stride long. He was half way there before Kyna caught up with him, a hand touching his shoulder for only a moment. Just enough to get him to turn and look at her.

**_ Thank you. I mean that._**

Kyna spent a long time in the stables, just sitting and thinking. However, she found her thoughts interrupted as two men entered, and she quickly departed. She couldn't think properly if she was using half of her brain to keep a wary eye on those men.

Kyna left the stables to sit cross-legged on the Wall looking out over Woad territory. This was becoming her new favourite place in the Fort; well, not her _favourite_ place, but she felt quite peaceful there. She felt that it was nice to be able to observe everything- and to be away from people.

She couldn't stop her mind from mulling over what Gawain said though. He had a brother that died; so there was pain there. But she wouldn't have realised unless he'd told her; she wouldn't have been able to guess. _How can he hide it so well behind a casual smile and pleasantness?_

Kyna couldn't answer her own question; but that only led her to think further on the subject. How could Gawain be so positive? How could he channel his pain into something so constructive? He had chosen to ensure that Galahad returned home to Sarmatia instead of wallowing in what he couldn't have done to save his brother. She didn't know how he did that.

Kyna couldn't as easily let her pain go. There was too much of it. And she had never yet found a cause worthy enough to distract her from it. With a sigh she leant her chin into the palm of her hand; Gawain had given her far too much to think about.

Eventually though, Kyna went to find her brother and the others. She needed a diversion from her thoughts. They were leaving the tavern just as she arrived and she could tell immediately that something was wrong. She looked at Tristan questioningly and saw that, though his expression was masked, his eyes were grimly set.

He seemed to ignore her intrigue however and instead asked, "Have you eaten?"

She shook her head.

**_ I'm fine, I'll eat later. What's wrong?_**

Then it was his turn to shake his head, though she still did not know why. In Tristan's opinion, Kyna didn't need to know why they were all discontented. She didn't need to know that they had had orders sent to them of a mission. Not until _they_ knew the details at least anyway.

She walked with the Knights to a courtyard and found herself left outside of its gates. She frowned. All of the Knights had been silent as they walked to the courtyard and had given her no indication as to what was going on. And that bothered her more than anything.

Kyna waited outside for a long time, her mind running over any situation that could keep them there, ranging from the obvious to the farfetched. It wasn't until the Knights eventually came out of the building and then the gated courtyard, none of them looking pleased in the slightest, that Kyna really started to worry though.

Gawain walked past her first, giving her an almost sad look as he did. Kyna could only frown. _Why that expression?_ she wondered. She couldn't answer that question, but she knew that whatever the cause was, it would not be good. Tristan was the last out of the courtyard, and he soon came to a stop in front of her.

**_ What is it?_ **she wrote curiously.

"We've been called on a mission. We shouldn't be more than a few days, but-" he started, but he stopped speaking as Kyna started to write something.

**_ I'm going with you._**

He stared for a second, a thousand thoughts running through his mind at once- all of them bad. One thing was certain though, his sister going on a mission was not a possibility.

"No, Kyna, you are not," he replied through half-clenched teeth.

**_ Yes, I am._**

"Kyna-"

**_ Tristan, I just found you. Don't leave me alone again._**

He frowned. What could he say to that? He didn't _want_ to have to leave her alone, but putting her in any form of danger was out of the question. And he had no choice in the matter; he _had_ to go. But she didn't, and at least at the Fort she was surrounded by stone walls that could keep her safe.

"You don't realise how dangerous this will be-"

She nodded quickly in disagreement and began writing her reply.

**_ I know danger, Tristan. Please. I won't be a dead weight; I can help. I'm actually good at that sort of thing. Please._**

His frown became a scowl, taking a deep breath. He knew that she could take care of herself- at least if she had a weapon in her hand- but Tristan still couldn't bring himself to allow her to come with them. So he tried a different tack.

"We have to communicate while we're out. What if you need help? What are you going to do then?"

His words may have been a bit harsh, but his point was valid. She stared at him for a moment, pain crossing her expression a little. Kyna knew the only reply that would appease her brother and she couldn't believe she was going to write it. She closed her eyes and waited a moment before replying.

**_ I can still scream if necessary._**

She looked back up at Tristan and watched as anguish and anger crept into his eyes at her reasoning. But she also watched his expression change slightly, and she saw the give in his resolve. Just like when they were children and she'd persuaded him into teaching her how to fight.

Kyna knew that Tristan would agree to let her join them now. Besides, it would have been pointless for him to say no; she'd just have followed them where ever they rode anyway. There would have been no way that they could have stopped her. And Tristan must have realised that, because, after a long while, he nodded. Kyna didn't smile, but merely placed a hand on his arm in thanks.

"If anything happens to you-" Tristan began, almost threateningly.

**_ It won't. Besides, what have I to be scared about now?_ **she admitted with sad eyes.

Tristan just hoped that they never found an answer to that question.


	8. Watch Your Back

They assembled in the stables, where Tristan had told Kyna to meet them, and she found the Knights already preparing themselves. She did the same, quickly organising and readying her horse, Ivor. The process didn't take her long since she was used to travelling light. In fact, she was ready before any of the others.

Tristan immediately went over to tell Arthur what was happening and why his sister was saddling her horse with the others. Initially, the commander seemed to be uncertain, but eventually he agreed. It was probably because of her threat to follow them anyway that he allowed it, she thought.

When Tristan returned to Kyna, he informed her that they were on their way to help a supply wagon that was headed to the Fort. In the past, their transports had been attacked by Woads because they were somewhat easy targets, and since the Woads had been so restless recently, Arthur thought it wise that they ride out to offer their protection.

With every Knight and Kyna ready, the group mounted their horses and rode out. As was expected, Kyna rode ahead with Tristan. He was happiest with it that way, just so that he could keep a close eye on her. Somewhere along the way, Tristan spoke to Kyna quietly so that only she heard him.

"You know there's still time to turn back?"

She gave him a levelling look in return. He just sighed. He knew that she'd reply like that. She hadn't kicked up that much fuss just to back down when she'd got what she wanted.

They set up camp that night and Arthur organised a watch system. Initially, the Knight's protested against putting Kyna on watch, but she vehemently insisted. She told them that she didn't sleep well outside anyway, and that she would somehow manage to wake them if there was any problem. Eventually, they let her do it, but only if she spent her first watch with her brother. They all knew that Tristan would be able to keep his keen eyes on their surroundings and hers at all times.

During their watch, they were silent. She couldn't speak to him in the dark, and he didn't try saying anything either. Neither of them minded the silence too much. They saw nothing of consequence when they looked out, and only a fox crossed their path as they stood on their midnight vigil.

They were relieved of their watch when the time came, and both went to get some sleep. Kyna only managed to get a couple of hours of sleep before she woke to the grey morning light of overhead cloud; it could have been any time in the early morning hours for all that she knew, but it was light enough for her to see at least, for which she was grateful.

Sitting up, she pushed herself off of the floor and looked around at the camp. The other Knights were asleep- as she should have been, but Kyna knew that she wouldn't sleep anymore than she had. Sleeping outside had always been a problem for her.

She walked over to the centre of their small camp, and placed another log on the low-lit fire. Kyna just stood there for a while with her arms folded over her chest for warmth and listened to the early morning sounds and crackling embers. That was until she noticed Gawain standing watch, and saw his eyes flicker over her. She nodded to him and made her way over to him.

"Morning," he said quietly.

"Can you not sleep?"

She shook her head. Thanks to the grey morning light and the torch beside Gawain, Kyna saw that there was just enough light for her to be able to explain herself.

**_ I don't like sleeping outside. Bad memories._**

He nodded, enquiring no further. For some reason, Gawain always seemed to know when to stop asking her questions; it was one of the things that she found comforting about him. Kyna sat down beside him, leaving a slight gap between them

**_How long have you been on watch?_**

"Not long."

She nodded. That meant that it would be a while before the others got up.

**_ Have you seen anything?_**

"No... I didn't think that we would. If the Woads are planning anything then they'll be focussed on the supply wagon. Not us... Not yet anyway."

She looked at him for a second, a little confused as to how he would know that.

"We're going to be a far easier target with the wagon than we are right now because we'll have to defend it as well as ourselves. And they're an easier target right now because they don't have us."

She nodded in understanding. They sat there then in silence until the others woke up, though, at some point, Kyna drifted into an unfamiliar and dreamless sleep. She woke up to the sound of voices, blinking awake suddenly. Gawain looked sideways at her at the abrupt movement and slightly disoriented expression on her face.

"Are you alright?"

**_ Did I just fall asleep?_**

He nodded and she stared for a moment. That was odd. She didn't know why she'd let herself do that- she never usually would have. She knew that she never usually would have felt comfortable enough to do it. _So why did I now?_

"I thought it best not to wake you."

She looked to her left at Gawain and nodded at him, but wrote nothing in response. If she was honest with herself, Kyna felt a little awkward and confused. So she just got up and walked back over to the fire, wrapping her cloak around her tightly. She wasn't going to let herself think about what the connotations of what had just happened were. She didn't want to wear herself out trying to understand what was so different about Gawain.

They rode on, and about half a day later, they came across the supply wagon. Arthur went to meet them first, to introduce the Knights and ensure that everything was as it should be. Soon enough, the Knights and Kyna were riding in formation around the wagon leading it toward the Fort. They wanted to waste no time in moving on- more time meant that they were an easier target for Woads.

"Keep your eyes focussed," Tristan told her.

Kyna nodded. They were looking out for Woads like those that had attacked her when the Knights had found her. She didn't like the people- but she understood them. She understood what they fought for; they craved the return of their country. There was nothing wrong with that.

The only problem Kyna found was that, to get it, they were trying to kill her brother and the others. She shrugged to herself. They wouldn't succeed. She had only just found Tristan; there was no way she was going to let these Woads take him from her.

They set up camp again that night and organised a watch with two Knights and two guards stationed at one time. And, at Tristan's insistence, Kyna once again conducted her watch with her brother. She stayed clear of those two other men, but that was no surprise. She avoided all of the guards; and they avoided her. The protective looks from all of the Knights warned all of the guards away from going anywhere near Kyna.

It was good that she had gotten more sleep than usual that morning because, after her watch, she slept lightly, wary of all their unknown company. Kyna did not get to sleep for long however, as a number of shouts and calls interrupted and she jolted awake.

The night sky was only just lightening to a deep bluish colour, and the only other light was from the three fires that they had set up in their camp, leaving Kyna's surroundings still vaguely distinguishable. But she knew the sounds of a fight, and she was certain that she had just woken up in the middle of one.

Everything was madness around her. She crouched, pushing her back against the rock that she'd chosen to sleep behind. From her position, no one could sneak up on her. Quickly, Kyna picked up her bow and fired an arrow at the first Woad she saw, and it hit its mark, knocking the target dead to the floor.

She continued to aim and fire at the Woads, her stare only lingering on them for long enough to see them fall lifeless to the ground. In the confusion of the fight, Kyna barely saw the arrow that flew in her direction. Thankfully, she did, and she managed to duck and roll out of its path. She fired an arrow of her own in swift response, killing the one that would have killed her.

As observant as she was, Kyna didn't notice the Woad that came at her back while she was exposed. He almost had her before Gawain, the closest of the Knights, intervened and put an axe in his back. Kyna didn't see it- but she heard it. She turned with an arrow poised and in place on her bow and barely managed to catch herself before letting it free.

If she had, then her shot would have gone directly for Gawain. As it was, she _did_ stop herself from releasing the arrow, and for a moment, her eyes flickered between the dead man on the ground and Gawain. She hadn't noticed that Gawain was fighting so closely to her. She hadn't noticed him there at all.

The battle ended quickly, with the Woads either dead or disbanded, and Tristan found his sister shortly after. She was relieved to see that he was unharmed, and he thought much the same. Tristan revealed to her then that he had been keeping an eye on her throughout the fight, whenever he had been able to see her that was.

"You fought well."

She smiled fleetingly. It wasn't really too much of a compliment to her that she had fought well. She'd seen too much pain at the end of a fight in her time. The only reason she doled it out herself now was because she refused to lose her brother. If a few months more of acting like this was the price for his life, then Kyna was willing to pay it.

"You need to watch your back though," Tristan added.

She looked at him quizzically.

"If Gawain hadn't stepped in at one point then we might not be having this conversation."

She blinked. She couldn't ask him what he meant, it was still too dark. But her thoughts dwelled on the matter. _Gawain 'stepped in'? When?_ She thought about it for a long time, recalling details of the battle. _There was the one moment when he got quite close all of a sudden- when I almost shot him_, she thought.

And when Kyna thought about it, that Woad that lay dead between them had too. Had Gawain stepped in? Had he effectively saved her life- and then said nothing about it? She frowned. She really didn't understand. That was the second time Gawain had done that; and he'd helped her in the tavern too. She was so confused. _What is any of this supposed to mean?_

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><p><strong>Author's Note: Sorry about the time it's taken me to update. I'm being busy at University at the moment. : Hope you all liked it and will let me know what you think! :)**

**Kit xx**


	9. The Worlds We Live In

They rode back to the Fort in the morning, and, though she wanted to, Kyna said nothing to Gawain. She didn't really get a chance since she couldn't exactly write whilst they were riding and he seemed to avoid her somewhat as they packed up their camp. She did keep shooting him sideways glances his way as they rode though. Luckily for her, no one noticed enough to think it odd.

And she didn't get to question him right away after they'd arrived either. First, on their return, they went to bathe and change. The blood on their clothes and bodies from that fight was not exactly the nicest of attire. Although Kyna still wished that she could have spoken to the long-haired Knight first, because all the while that she was bathing, meant that her brother's words echoed in her mind.

She didn't understand Gawain. She needed to speak to him- soon. But she couldn't ask him about anything while the others were there though. That would be too strange. Besides, she didn't want to admit to anyone that she was confused; that would be a weakness. And she had no idea why she seemed to feel this confusion so strongly around Gawain.

With the fact that Kyna needed to speak to Gawain alone so urgently, she was left utterly amazed at the complete coincidence that Gawain was the only one in the tavern when she arrived. She took a seat beside him and wrote a questioning note as to where the others were.

He found it a little odd to have her choose to be in such close proximity to him, but he said nothing, and instead chose to reply to her question. Gawain told her that he didn't know about the others, but Bors was 'busy' and Galahad was throwing knives with her brother. He pointed them out to her and she nodded. She didn't know why or how she hadn't noticed them there before.

She was quite glad that they were busy; it meant that she would have more time to discuss things with Gawain. Kyna knew what she wanted to talk about, but she didn't feel that she could just come out and say it. First, she chose to discuss something that might lead into what she really wanted to know. She didn't quite understand how the Knights had known what would happen with the wagon; why the attack had happened just as they had predicted it would.

_** How did you all know that they'd attack the supply wagon?**_

"The Woads think that it's one of the easiest ways to get rid of us," Gawain answered matter-of-factly.

She stared.

"If we have no food, then we might be forced to leave," he explained.

She nodded, understanding their reasoning now. Had she been in their position then she probably would have tried the same to get invaders out of her homeland. If only Gawain was as easy to understand.

Kyna paused for a moment, but then eventually wrote, _**Tristan said**_

She paused again, only to take a deep breath and ready herself for the conversation that she was just about to start.

_**He said that you 'stepped in' last night and helped me.**_

She looked up to watch Gawain's expression, thinking that that might help her understand some things. He looked down at the table for a moment and then back up at her. The way she was staring at him made him think that she was uncomfortable with the notion of being helped, and therefore made him reluctant to answer.

_**You did, didn't you?**_

After a moment, he nodded.

_**When?**_

"Just before you almost shot me. Your back was exposed," he clarified.

She stared. It had been when she had thought then. Kyna didn't know what to say now that she knew he had saved her life- again.

She settled on, _**Sorry about almost shooting you.**_

Gawain shrugged.

"You didn't."

After a while of silence between them, she wrote, _**Thank you.**_

"Anytime."

She tilted her head at him, still somewhat confused. She didn't understand what he meant, but it was almost nice to hear anyway.

_** Why though?**_

Her question caught him off guard. Kyna clearly didn't trust much- she had good reason not to if her past was anything to go on. But did she really just ask him why he saved her life?

Recovering himself, Gawain answered, "It was the right thing to do."

She didn't understand, and she wrote the sentiment to him. She didn't want to admit that, but he was driving her insane. _Why can't he just make sense?_ Gawain frowned slightly and shifted in his seat. _This is going to be uncomfortable_, he thought.

"I told you about the vow I made to myself to ensure that Galahad returns home, yes?"

She nodded.

"I may have made another one recently."

She stared at him blankly.

"You've been through enough in your life; and now you're volunteering to help us? The least you deserve is to go home."

Kyna blinked, stunned. _What did he just say?_ She didn't have time to answer him- or even think of something to answer him with- before Bors and Dagonet came and sat down at their corner table. She still stared at him though; and he stared back, a tiny, guilty smile playing on his lips for only a moment. She couldn't have said anything to that even if she'd been able to.

She didn't get another chance to speak to Gawain that night. He conveniently slipped off at one point, and she was cursing him for it. All she had wanted was to stop being so confused, but their conversation had only made things so much worse. She went back to her room later in the evening, and Tristan walked back with her to accompany her. On the way, he noticed that something was clearly bothering his sister and eventually had to ask about it.

"Kyna?"

She looked up.

"Is something wrong?"

She shook her head. Kyna was thankful that it was too dark for her to have to come up with an explanation for her mood. Thankfully, Tristan accepted that and didn't question her again, even though he knew that something still troubled her. When she had bade her brother goodnight and was back in her room, Kyna tried to get some sleep.

Sleep once again eluded her however; what Gawain had said bothered her too much for her to relax enough to sleep. He'd vowed to himself that she'd go home. _Why would he do that? What are his reasons? _She groaned into her pillow. Why was he so confusing? Why did he even care that she lived? Why did she have so many questions rolling around in her mind about him?

The next morning, after a night of absolute sleeplessness, she determined to find Gawain and talk to him. Kyna went to the tavern and asked Vanora where Gawain might be. The older woman replied that that he was probably still asleep.

_** Where is his room?**_

Vanora frowned, a little confused. Kyna made up some nonsense about having borrowed something of his and needing to return it to the long-haired Knight which seemed to work in order to get an answer from Vanora. Though for her part, Vanora was sceptical of Kyna's explanation, despite her nodding and providing directions.

Thanking Vanora with a nod and a small smile, Kyna set off. She didn't find it too hard to find the building that Vanora had described. She'd seen it before in her observations of the Fort. She went in and knocked on the first door on the left as Vanora had told her to.

After a while, Gawain answered, pulling open the door and standing in full view. Kyna blinked and stopped breathing for a second at the sight of him. It wasn't that the Knight wasn't completely dressed, or the battle scars that littered his naked chest, that bothered her. It was simply the fact that being around any shirtless man made her at least somewhat uncomfortable- even if it was one that she almost seemed to trust. Gawain just stood in his doorway, surprised to see her visiting him.

"Kyna? What...?"

But he stopped talking as she started to write.

_** Would you mind putting a shirt on before we talk?**_

The almost-pleading gaze that she flashed him made him look down at himself and nod. He slipped a shirt over his head quickly and returned to the door.

"Better?"

She nodded, feeling slightly better.

_** Thank you.**_

Kyna paused for a moment, considering that as a cue to go back to her original business.

_**What did you mean last night?**_

Gawain blinked.

"What do _you_ mean?" he asked.

_** When you said that you made another vow?**_

He ran a hand back through his hair in almost frustration and let out a long, deep sigh.

"I meant what I said. I want you to go home."

_** Why?**_

"Does it really matter?" he asked with a small sigh.

_**To me it does.**_

He sighed again. He didn't know how to answer her question in any clearer a way than that he just wanted her to go home safely after all the injustice she'd suffered in her life.

"Because... because, I don't know. You deserve to go home."

_** I don't understand.**_

"I can't explain it, Kyna."

She frowned.

_** Please?**_

He shrugged.

"I don't know what to say. It's just a decision I made; and I'm not going to change my mind."

Her frown became a scowl. She didn't like not understanding people's actions.

She didn't like owing people either. So she just turned and started to walk away, leaving Gawain standing in his doorway, bemused as she began to storm off. _What is he doing?_ she thought. _Why do I even care this much?_

Then something happened that she did not expect. Gawain caught her arm before she could reach the building's exit and she froze. As soon as she stopped, he let go of her, and as he did, he saw her relax a little. He stepped in front of her since she didn't turn back to him.

"Kyna wait a second."

She didn't move and merely stared at him.

"Why are you running away from me?"

She frowned and shook her head.

"That's not an answer, Kyna," he said quietly.

After a while, she gathered herself up enough to write, _**You don't make any sense.**_

He looked at her reply and then back at her face. Her expression made it obvious that she found that hard to write, though he didn't understand why.

"What do you mean?"

_**I don't understand you.**_

Gawain was about to reply when she cut him off by holding up a hand and then writing some more. He waited patiently though he knew he didn't have to.

_**I haven't lived in a world where people try to save your life, or where they promise to protect you, since I was a little girl. That is a fantasy. I know what reality is like. People **__**aren't**__** like you. They don't do the things that you do without a reason. I just want to understand your reasoning- to make sure it's not... I need it to make sense.**_

Gawain looked dumbfounded at her written speech, so much so that it took him a moment to gather his thoughts.

"You think I'm doing this because of some twisted reason?"

She just stared, neither confirming or denying the accusation.

"I'm not, Kyna. This is a different world to the one you've been living in. Here we care for each other."

Kyna was about to write something, but Gawain made her pause. This time it was his turn to talk.

"I want you to go home because everything that I know you've been through and the things that I can only guess about bothers me; every remnant that won't leave you alone angers me. We've been hurt because of an old treaty, you were hurt for no reason at all," he said quietly.

"I don't like injustice and you deserve to have a happy ending. That's why I want to make sure that you go home, Kyna. You deserve it."

She could barely keep her mouth from dropping open at that. Gawain's words barely registered at first, and she still wasn't quite sure that she understood what he was saying. Gawain was clearly unlike any man she'd ever met. And that frightened her more, so she fled again, and this time, Gawain didn't follow her.

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><p><strong>Author's Note: Okayyyyy, so things are getting a little serious, hm? Please do let me know what you think! :)<strong>

**Kit xx**


	10. Seeing Things

Kyna avoided Gawain from then on. If she saw him, then she would stay away. She wouldn't talk to him; she even refused to look at him if she could help it. She didn't understand that what he had done, he did with good intentions. With all the bad intentions she'd met in her life, she just couldn't comprehend it.

And since he hadn't explained it enough or helped her to understand, she thought it best to ignore him. A week passed of this and the others started to notice. Until one particularly noticeable moment when Kyna got up to leave the tavern just as Gawain sat down at the corner table.

"What did you do to her?" Lancelot asked, one brow raised.

The long-haired Knight shrugged and looked after the silent woman as she disappeared. It had been bothering him all week that she'd been avoiding him, but he couldn't blame her for it. She had suffered so much in her past that he wouldn't question her in this. She must have had her reasons, after all.

"I have no idea," he replied eventually.

Tristan eyed him carefully. He was incredibly suspicious of his sister's strange actions in regard to the long-haired Knight. But she had said nothing to him, so he couldn't force himself to be too worried.

"Whatever it was, you'd better figure it out. Women are known to hold grudges."

"You would know," Galahad put in.

"Indeed," Lancelot grinned.

"And I have paid the price for it on a number of occasions, which just proves that Gawain should follow my advice. Besides, Kyna's a lot more dangerous than the women I'm with; you ought to be careful you don't end up with an arrow in your back."

Gawain just rolled his eyes; but he knew that Lancelot had a point. Not about ending up with an arrow in his back, but he did have to figure out why Kyna was ignoring him. He knew it had something to do with the vow he'd told her about. He hadn't thought that it would do any damage, but apparently it had.

The Knight assumed that Kyna would have gone to bed after leaving the tavern, and he didn't want to appear like he was cornering her in her room in the middle of the night. He knew how she would feel about that whether it was intended or not. So he decided to confront her in the morning.

However, Kyna did not return to her room when she left that tavern as Gawain had thought. She went to the wall instead, to sit and look out into semi-darkness in her self-imposed solitude. She sat there for some time, enjoying her uninterrupted peace until something caught her eye.

Kyna tilted her head and looked down at the ground beyond the wall. She could have sworn that she'd seen something. Her eyes carefully watched over the dark plain before her, searching for any sort of movement that she might catch. _Perhaps I imagined it_, she thought after awhile.

She started to shift and only then did she catch another glimpse of a something below, something North of the wall. Kyna froze. She was certain that she had seen something that time; and that could mean nothing good. A frown creased her brow; she couldn't ignore what she may or may not have seen.

So she wrote something down on a scrap of paper and made her way to the nearest guard. Typically, he brushed Kyna off and refused to read the paper. He seemed to see her as a simple irritation and brushed her away quickly.

"Leave me alone, girl," he said.

"Get off the wall and stop being a nuisance."

Kyna scowled and persisted to bother the man. She wasn't giving up. What she'd seen could have been anything for all that they knew. But the man adamantly refused to look, even when she pointed persistently out over the wall.

"Look if you've dropped something, then you should wait until morning; maybe it'll still be there," he joked.

Kyna growled. She could have hit the man. This could be life or death and he was ignoring her. After staring at him for a moment, she knew that she would have to try something else; she could never have forgiven herself if she just let this go now. If someone was going to attack the Fort, even if she just thought that they were going to, she had to get a second opinion. And she had to do it quickly.

Unfortunately, she knew which of the Knights was closest to her. Gawain. She ran to his room so quickly that her mind barely processed the fact that she was still meant to be avoiding him. Safety was more important than how she felt, she knew that. So she stopped outside of his door, panting from the speed of her run.

As she knocked on his door, Kyna was thankful that there was a torch in the corridor outside. _At least he will be able to understand what I'm saying. _Eventually, Gawain answered, half-asleep and rubbing his eyes. He was wearing a simple shirt and trousers, Kyna was glad to find. She didn't know how she would have reacted if he'd have been wearing anything less again.

"Kyna?" Gawain asked, confused.

She had been ignoring him for days and now, for some reason, she had turned up outside his door in the middle of the night. He didn't understand and obviously couldn't help but find it a little strange. His immediate thought was that she was in some sort of trouble.

"Are you alright?"

Kyna's lip twitched and she went immediately to write something down. The Knight waited patiently for her to finish though he was extremely curious to discover why she had paid him a visit looking so flustered. She pulled him over to the torch and held her note out to him.

**_ I was sitting out on the wall, looking North, and **_I think-_** I swear I saw something move. Twice._**

Gawain frowned.

"Did you tell the guard?"

**_He wouldn't even look._**

"And you're sure?"

Kyna paused for a moment and met Gawain's eyes.

**_I don't know. But I can't leave it, what if I did see something and then something bad happens?_**

Gawain stared.

**_I just need a second opinion_**_, _she finally admitted.

**_Please?_**

At that, the Knight couldn't help but nod. The look on her face had convinced him that there was something wrong. Besides, if she had inherited her brother's good eyesight then there was a very great possibility that she had indeed seen something. And there would be nothing wrong with just checking anyway though.

Leaving the door open, Gawain went back into his room to grab a few of his weapons. With that done, they went straight to the Wall. They passed the guard that she'd spoken to, who rolled his eyes at the sight of her. He was just surprised that she'd managed to convince someone to come back with her to try and find whatever it was that she had lost. _Stupid girl,_ he thought.

But Gawain took no notice of the man and followed Kyna to the spot she'd been sitting in. The two of them stood there, motionless, for a long while. Gawain squinted into the darkness, unable to pick anything out until Kyna noticed something and pointed him in the right direction. Unfortunately, Kyna hadn't been wrong about seeing movement beyond the wall.

"Oh no," Gawain whispered.

Kyna frowned. That could not be good.

"Kyna, I need you to go and collect your bow- and wake Tristan, Dagonet and Lancelot while you're there."

She nodded, sensing the urgency in the Knight's voice. Then Gawain turned on the guard who had ignored her and gave him orders to send for Arthur and the other Knights whilst he raised the alarm along the wall. Kyna shot the guard a vindicated smirk before disappearing off to find her brother.

She ran quickly, running through most of the Fort until she made it back to the building that housed their rooms. Furiously, she knocked on her brother's door before running to do the same on Lancelot and Dagonet's doors. Tristan answered first and looked at Kyna confusedly for a moment, so she went back to him and scribbled a quick note.

**_ I saw something moving North of the Wall. Gawain saw it too. He told me to come and get you. And to get my weapons too_**, she added hurriedly.

At that, Tristan nodded and looked over to the other two Knights as they emerged from their rooms.

"There's trouble at the wall. Gawain wants us to bring weapons."

As the Knights retreated into their rooms to collect their weapons and armour, Kyna did the same. They convened in the corridor again and followed Kyna back to where she'd left Gawain earlier. By the time they got there though, the scene was very different from how it had been when Kyna left it.

Every torch on the wall was lit, illuminating the scene before them. It was a good thing too, because the wall was being swarmed by Woads. Somehow some Woads had managed to get onto the wall and were now busily fighting against the Romans and Gawain. Kyna, her brother and the others ran up to the wall to join in the throng.

"Gawain!" Lancelot shouted, trying to get the long-haired Knight's attention.

"Not the best time, Lancelot," Gawain replied as he pulled his axe from a Woad's body and pushed him back over the edge of the wall.

"Just a surprise attack?" Lancelot tried again.

"Seems planned," Gawain replied.

"They even have ladders."

"Shouldn't be too much of a problem," Bors yelled over the fray.

If any of the Knights were close enough to him then they would have seen the Knight rush at a ladder and send it, and the Woads climbing it, hurtling back to the ground.

The others found each other on the wall as the Woads were trying to attack. In fact, a lot more of them were almost succeeding in making it into the Fort. So the Knights quickly fell into the fight. Kyna and the others with bows were focussing on shooting those that were advancing, and their archers, so that those without bows could deal with any stragglers that made it on to the wall.

Gawain had chosen to stick by Kyna just in case any Woad made it too close to her. She dealt with the long-range targets, and since Gawain had only got the weapons he'd brought with him, he dealt with the closer targets. Kyna frowned, but did not question it for the moment. She knew that this had something to do with that vow he had made. And she would have to speak to him about that later; she had no time now.

At one point a Woad got closer to Kyna than she would have liked. She had been too busy taking down an archer that had been pestering them. Luckily, Gawain had stepped in and killed him. _Unluckily_, the blade the Woad carried grazed her back, and cut her slightly. But she'd had worse and barely even noticed the impact. Kyna just continued to fight anyway.

They fought until the sky lightened. The problem was that the Woads just kept coming. Apparently they had been well-prepared for this siege. And Kyna knew that if it hadn't been for her looking out then the Fort would be in a far worse position. She'd had enough of battles, particularly those in the night. But the Knights and the Romans won, defending themselves from the onslaught. Covered in blood, they finally drove the Woads away.

"Kyna," Gawain said.

She looked around and pushed a strand of hair away from her face.

"We should go to the infirmary."

She frowned and shrugged. If this was to do with his ridiculous vow then she would strangle him. She was fine. But then, as Kyna looked at the long-haired Knight, Kyna noticed the shaft of an arrow sticking out of Gawain's shoulder and the blood dripping down his thin shirt. She blinked and put her hand by the arrow shaft, attempting to inspect it closer. _When did that happen?_ she wondered.

"Kyna," he repeated, clearly grimacing a little.

She nodded and went with him to the infirmary. The awkwardness between them would just have to wait for a moment when Gawain didn't have an arrow sticking out of his shoulder.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: ATTACKKKKKKK! (I had no sleep last night, so forgive that outburst. :P)<strong>

**Hope you enjoyed the chapter and will let me know what you think! :)**

**Kit xx**


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